Harlow Town are coming

Nikki has been so brutally honest in his post match interviews that they have now received a 12A rating. If we fail to beat bottom of the table Harlow Town on Saturday they may be reclassified as 15.

A win would see us nudge safely into mid table. A defeat would see us blocking Sammy and Jack and their little friends from Twitter. 

There may be scouts and guides from Herne Bay watching the game. You will easily spot them eating bananas and not disposing of the litter in the black bins provided.

Carshalton 2 - 1 Tanners

Nikki is starting to let things slip. He wasn't wearing a suit but still looked rather nice in blazer and tie.

Carshalton are newly promoted but their budget doesn't yet stretch to real grass. They called an emergency supporters meeting in a pub but there was no appetite for it.

Both sets of supporters approached this game in a low key manner with low expectations. Those expectations were well met in a scrappy first half.

The 2nd half was much livelier. Early on a goal mouth scramble saw the ball hit the bar but it was Carshalton who took the lead on 64' through a similar scramble, then fired in a long range effort a few minutes later to go 2 up.

Robert Cullen grabbed one back with a diving header. The referee then showed he was a wimp by choosing to ignore a handball right in front of his nose when a Carshalton defender deliberately prevented a header going into the net.

We can feel very unlucky to only get a single point from 2 hard fought bank holiday weekend games.

It's not all bad news though. At least we didn't lose 5-0 at home. A long way to go to take a few photos and tweet.

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead's Bank Holiday travels continue with a trip to Carshalton Athletic.

We have just one more point than them, and it could have been more but for a last minute equaliser.

Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas.

Tanners 1 - 1 Bishops Stortford

The loud and passionate Leatherhead supporters, well Woody and Gary, travelled the 60 miles to Hertfordshire and returned with a hard earned point. 

Rod had dispensed with his "RE" touchline jacket and was loitering behind the goal incognito. He explained that as company secretary he was still very much entitled to wear the jacket but he just wasn't in the mood. 

Rod was however in nostalgic mood tenderly carrying an FA Cup 1st Round programme of Leatherhead v Bishops Stortford from 1976.  Nikki was bang up to date though. He was sporting a glorious bespoke saville row suit in dashing grey. Ooh! Suits you sir.

Meanwhile on the pitch, Bishops Stortford had the best of the first half having a penalty saved and missing a one on one, but it was the Tanners who went in 1 up at half time with a header from Sean Okojie on 43'.

We were quite comfortable in the 2nd half and looked the more likely to score until a late equaliser on 89' prevented our first away win of the season. It was probably a fair result yet somewhat disheartening.

Nous voyageons a Carshalton jour ferie lundi.

Travelling Tanners

There is great anticipation surrounding the trip to Hertfordshire on Saturday. Will Nikki wear the same suit, a different suit, or casual clothing? Will he smile?

These are just some of the important issues facing us as we travel to Bishops Stortford who have made a sideways move from the Southern Premier. They have had a poor start to the season with just one point so will be anxious to chalk up their first win.  Meanwhile Sean and Travis will be looking to add to their goal tally and propel us further up the league.

Exciting times. You certainly wouldn't want to be driving around France for 2 weeks when Devon is just as nice.  Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas!

Levred 2 - 1 Haringey

Nikki Bull showed our previous managers how to look the part today. 

Gone. The tracksuit of some Mooro. 
Gone. The skinny jeans and man bun of the Bulldog.
Gone. The homeless beard and pocket billiards.

What we saw instead was a wonderful elegant blue suit so it was fortunate that Nikki was not in goal today or it would have got crumpled. He was replaced by a very competent Craig Ross who had made 39 appearances for Barnet last season.

A strong first half performance and goals from Okojie and Gregory gave us our first win of the season leaving us just 3 points off the play offs. Next up we are away to Bishops Stortford and a chance to see if Nikki has more than one suit.

Meanwhile, the Haringey Borough manager played the part of a sore loser going berserk at the final whilst trying to attack our manager. He was found not guilty of affray so you knew it was bad. Apparently he wasn't offended by the suit but livid about alleged  time wasting as we ran out of balls in the final few minutes. Hardly our fault though as his players had hoofed them all into the car park and the river.

Tanners 1 - 1 Whitehawk

The mysterious cloud of what really happened at the end of last season is still lingering over Fetcham Grove. 

Jack Midson continues to tweet snidey remarks and laughing emojis but won't actually say anything of interest. Meanwhile Nikki Bull is valiantly trying to build a side of players that can compete in the league after Sammy and Jack decimated the side. Their bold 5 year plan, explained with such passion at the fans' forum, turned into a one year then run off to a salt marsh plan.

After a worrying display at Hornchurch, this was a much more encouraging performance and the Tanners were unlucky not to take all 3 points. Sean Okojie smashed the ball into the net to equalise in the first half, but will be disappointed that he didn't convert one of 2 golden chances to win the game.

There were also encouraging performances from new boys Robert Cullen and Travis Gregory, whilst Jerry and Dan Gallagher showed those in Essex that the words loyalty and commitment weren't just catchphrases.

3 points on Saturday and all will begin to be forgotten......

Whitehawk are coming

Whitehawk put down an early marker at the weekend, and come to Leatherhead no doubt full of confidence.  Leatherhead meanwhile try to find their feet after a disjointed performance away at AFC Hornchurch over the week.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

AFC Hornchurch 3 - 0 Tanners

Too early to say what this result truly means for the season; our hosts could be a big spending team on the up or a side punching above their weight.  That said, those in attendance will be leaving with a sense of foreboding.  This could be a long season.

When the first goal came we were quietly going about our business.  Travis looked strong and confident on the ball and our J League signing was spraying the ball around nicely.  After the goal our work became quieter, practically a whimper.

In the second half Leatherhead mustered a tame shot on goal and a free kick that was tipped around the post.  Meanwhile AFC Hornchurch grew in confidence, something you can win in pre-season, and went on to score two more.

Whitehawk on Wednesday, a side with ambitions to get promoted...

Travelling Tanners

Here we go again.  Another season starts tomorrow after one of the lowest of low key pre-seasons I can recall.  Nikki seems confident in this approach but I can't help feel a comfortable win against Knaphill or Guildford United would go a long way to build some confidence on and off the pitch.

Our hosts were last year's Isthmian North Champions and they, by stark contrast, have enjoyed their pre-season.  Winning three games against Dulwich Hamlet, Concord and Enfield.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Travelling Tanners

The last friendly and a trip to Farnborough as we hope Leatherhead can transition from "coming together" to "come together" by getting our first win.

Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas.

Reading U23 are coming

The last home friendly today, and after losing all of the previous ones I wonder whether we should rearrange this and welcome Reading U13s to try and get a win.

The manager seems happy with the progress (and process, as is fashionable to say) and a few stars have been emerging.

Kick off at 3pm. Good luck with the process, fellas!

Eastleigh are coming

After a tough test against Aldershot, which didn't go too well as it ended 0-4, we face Eastleigh in another preseason friendly.

Kick off at 3pm.  Hope the preparation for the season goes well!

Aldershot Town are coming

A blast from the past today as we host Aldershot Town, a club we faced as the Phoenix outfit came through our league a while ago.

Kick off at 3pm. There may even be an international friendly on the bar TV too...

Fixtures are out

The fixtures are out, and we start with a trip to top of the league AFC Hornchurch.  This is then followed by Whitehawk at home.

Official site update

The Lip's link to the official site has been updated... yes, it has been a slow news month.

Merstham 3 - 1 Tanners

Twice now we have arrived at Sutton for the Surrey Senior Cup with a back story.  Last time we had only just won the play-offs and were clearly deflated, last night we had news of a pending departure and it appeared to have an equally unsettling effect.

We did open well, but soon Merstham got into their stride and on the whole we were second best.  There were some good performanced.  Niall was always willing to run at defenders, Jerry committed as ever and Jack looked up for it but this was mainly down to a running battle between him and their no6.

One goal came in the first half (looked like a mishap in defence when we failed to clear), and then two in the second (sloppy half-arsed pass that was cut out and a powerful shot from distance).

We did get one back, a Jack Midson header but we were soon heading out the well disguised exit.

Merstham were the better side all round, but one cannot help feel the timing of the negotiations coming to a conclsuion ruined any chance we had to even compete.  The search for a new manager continues...

The final...

Tonight Leatherhead take on Merstham in the Surrey Senior Cup final.  A side that always seems to find an extra gear when we face each other, or indeed an extra hand when blocking shots on the line.

A new elephant has entered the room.  Football finds it hard to keep a secret at the best of times but the timing of the latest story to break is very unfortunate.

Off to Gander Green we go then.  Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here. See you in the queue to get in about 6pm!

Travelling Tanners

Two teams will face each other that probably hoped for more.  Tonbridge Angels would have started the season believing they had an outside chance of sneaking in, and while our hopes were muted for much of the season the final run in gave us real hope.

Of course there is a chance we could steal a place, but it would mean a goal swing of 13 goals and with Hendon sure to be there I cannot believe they are going to put Leiston to the sword.

Still a season to be proud of though and with the Surrey Senior Cup still to play for it could get even better.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.

Tanners 1 - 2 Hendon

A game too far for Leatherhead as they fall short (subject to a miracle) of the play-offs, despite some heroic performances in recent weeks.

It was a shambolic start to the match, with Leatherhead not being able to do any of the basics right.  Balls were bouncing off of shins and passes going astray.  Hendon pounced on this uncertainty and hammered in their opening goal.  This then set the tone for some time wasting of the highest order.

We thought we had a first half equaliser, but no Russian lino at hand to see if the ball had crossed the line or not.

The second half needed a response and we got it, but it came at a cost.  So thin is our squad, changes could only be made internally within the starting eleven.  Gallagher and Midson both advanced with others forced to shuffle back and play out of position.

It initially paid off, with Midson heading home and the 'keeper pulling off two top saves.  Tom Richards gave way to Calum and the defencive frailty was exposed as Hendon scored late to cement their place in the play-offs and ours outside of them.

Disappointment but from a team that only had real purpose in the last few weeks of last season to where we are today, chuck in the FA Cup and the pending Surrey Senior Cup it has been a great season.  We just now hope they can stick together and have no one Wander off...