Travelling Tanners

It won't be all dolphins and kiss-me-quick hats today for our trip to Margate, as we travel to Margate for the more routine matter of deciding who is more mid-table.

It is also a chance to reintroduce ourselves to ex-Leatherhead manager, Mike Sandmann.  He has been there, as joint manager, since May last year.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 2 - 1 Worthing

Fun fact: just under 15 years ago I held my stag-do in Worthing and I turned up thinking this would go much the same way; ending up with a spanking.  However, I was pleasantly surprised.

The first half did little to persuade me otherwise.  The crowd was unusually subdued and Leatherhead were little better.  There were some signs of promise but Worthing looked comfortable.  Their goal came from some Leatherhead pressure, where their 'keeper gathered the ball and launched a low powerful drive to their breakaway players.  A slip in defence and from our 'keeper allowed a tap in.  1-0.

The rest of the half became surreal, an innocuous coming together saw a Worthing player suffer whiplash type injuries and he lay prostate on the ground for 45 minutes until an ambulance arrived.  The last three minutes was then played out before the half time whistle was blown.

We needed a response and we got one.  Leatherhead cam out with a spring in their step and saw Worthing under pressure for much of the half.  Our opening goal came from a wickedly taken free kick which the 'keeper could only palm into the path of Olutade, who made no mistake.  Moments later we struck the bar from a similarly placed free kick.

Our day seemed to get better when their No 2 (a player with plenty to say to the ref) received his second yellow of the match and were down to ten men.  Our numerical advantage didn't seem to count for too much when Worthing won a penalty but Zak came to our rescue, pulling off a fine diving save.

A win was in the air, you could smell it, and when Shaun was able to swing a left foot on a lose ball in the box and direct it in off of the far post the three points were heading our way.

A fine win and a much needed boost before the long trip to Margate...

Worthing are coming!

Worthing travel up the A24 for this league fixture.  Our guests are flirting with the play-off places, but got the cold shoulder in the week when they were at the wrong end of a 4-1 beating at the hands of Dorking Wanderers.

Leatherhead's mixed form continues.  It is anyone's guess as to how we get on against a team looking to bounce back.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there.

Corinthian-Casuals 2 - 1 Tanners

Leatherhead complete an unfortunate double, losing 2-1 home and away to Corinthian-Casuals.  For the first seven to eight minutes we were sensational and could have notched up a healthy 3-0 lead had we taken the clear chances that fell our way.  We put away our third chance when the 'keeper could only pat Shaun's powerful shot into the path of Wallace who placed the ball into the back of the net.

At 1-0 there was a certain feeling that the rest of the game would be academic - Leatherhead meant business - but that soon dissipated as we went on to play 80 minutes of mediocre football.

The hosts played their part, applying pressure for ten minutes where they looked very dangerous but we appeared to have weathered that storm when they struck.  They broke away from our corner and slotted it past Zak.

Fifteen minutes into the second half and Corinthian-Casuals took the lead.  A cross and a tap in doing the damage this time.

I am not saying this game was boring but my son informed me seven trains passed by during the game.  I wish he had alerted me to this sideshow earlier as it could have spared me watching Leatherhead surrender possession within midfield with alarming regularity.  I could have admired the latest South West Trains livery instead of the slumped shoulders of players that looked very much beaten.

So it is home to Worthing next Saturday.  No trains to watch but we are on a flight path, so passenger plane spotting could be on the cards...

Travelling Tanners

Lock up your referee assistants, we are going to Corinthian-Casuals.  We travel to Tolworth in search of a little bit of revenge.  In the home game, in truth, we were bullied a bit by a side pumped up on the injustice of a dodgy penalty.  They also took their chances where we fluffed our lines.

The table proves to be as dynamic as ever this year, with us returning to the comfort of mid table but a loss would send our hosts above us.

Kick-off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there.

Tanners 2 - 1 Potters Bar

This game was quickly chalked up to be a "must win" as a loss would see our guests go above us while make the relegation zone loom large.  Therefore both clubs set out with the task of who could look more average.

Potters Bar certainly looked more average than us, by virtue of the fact we were looking distinctly lacking in most departments.  The warning signs were there before Potters Bar scored, in the end a simple through ball and a confident finish made it 0-1.

Thankfully Leatherhead upped their game.  Dan Gallagher bossed midfield while Travis looked lively.  It was through Travis we equalised; latching onto a calmly placed Jerry pass to beat the 'keeper near post.

Into the second half and Leatherhead looked a lot better and it wasn't long after the restart we made it 2-1.  Amoo, back to his lively self, sent in a perfect ball for Olutade to get his head onto.  Normally we would expect a diving header to fly over the bar but he found the roof of the net to score a goal to be proud of.

The ref', who had quite a good first half, then took centre stage,  Leatherhead would feel they could have had two penalties, certainly the second appeal looked more certain when the defender took out Sean first before even getting close to the ball. 

Try as he might, the ref' couldn't bring about the equaliser - despite some good pressure from the visitors - and the must win was won.

Corinthian Casuals next week, I hope it is a calmer affair than the last game...

Potters Bar are coming

After the disappointment of the Mole Valley derby, we entertain Potters Bar today and a real chance to get back to winning ways.

Potters Bar have enjoyed a similar journey in the league to us; sitting just one point behind us.

Kick off at 3pm, see you there.

Dorking Wanderers 2 - 0 Tanners

In a match of David and Goliath, The Goliath of Leatherhead was slayed by the Dorking David; armed only with a sling, a free ground and a squad heavily subsidised by Denbies.

I have to say, I felt like an old man entering the ground.  Reminiscing of the natural banked terraces that could easily cope with a large crowd.  This new modern stadium seemed to lack this (the camber of the area behind the far goal seemed to ebb away, reducing the opportunity to view the game for example)  and would surely fail to live up to the 2,500 capacity it boasts.   A ten minute delay was needed for a crowd 1,000 shy of this.

Leatherhead did not really threaten.  We had a shot on goal that looked certain to beat the 'keeper that went wide but other than that it was either tame or direct at the 'keeper.  The first half was dominated by a ref that loved the attention and dished out yellow cards for not much really

Dorking hardly set the world alight but were clinical when needed.  Sole latching onto to a through ball in the first half and a clinical finish in the second.

No New Year's Day game for us; we are home to Potters Bar on Saturday...

Travelling Tanners

Finally Leatherhead get to play this rearranged fixture from March, and a chance to finally see Dorking's publicly funded new stadium.

Dorking started the season as the pacesetters but have dropped away in recent weeks.

Kick off at 3pm.  In the £1-an-hour car park by 11am.  See you there.

Tanners 1 - 0 Carshalton

A last gasp winner to warm the hearts of the Leatherhead fans who are scratching their heads over what has gone wrong this Christmas.  Normally Santa brings you presents, but this year the fat bugger appears to have made off with D'Sean and £30,000 of FA Cup winnings.

The first half was difficult to watch.  Firstly, we changed ends and played towards the Leisure Centre end which means you miss some of the game when going to the queue for the tea bar.  Also, Leatherhead continued to play some overly ambitious long diagonal balls that were cut out with ease.

Second half and we managed to string some nice moves together and looked a lot more threatening.  When Gallagher struck the bar and the follow-up blasted over it looked like our it wasn't going to be our day (Carshalton also hit the woodwork) but we found a way to break the deadlock.

The sub made a massive difference.  Rob Cullen came on and just added the composure required in these situations.  Then in the last minute of normal time a ball was swung into the box that saw Sean, Ibrrahim and a defender converge on the ball.  Some thought Sean had headed it home, I thought it was an own goal, but tit was Ibrahim with the decisive touch.

On to Saturday, and the much awaited trip to Dorking Wanderers and their flash new ground...

Carshalton are coming...

Shhh... don't tell the club they've forgotten to rearrange this fixture for 10am. This Boxing Day game kicks off at the optimum time of 3pm at should see a big crowd come to The Grove.

If you can have a bogey team after just a couple of games it would be Carshalton. A clear handball on the line went unpunished in the league fixture, while a stunning comeback saw us knocked out in a bizarre penalty shootout.

With a 2-0 defeat in the game before Christmas, Leatherhead will say their bad form is behind them. Oh yes it is... oh no it isn't...

Carshalton are coming...

Shhh... don't tell the club they've forgotten to rearrange this fixture for 10am. This Boxing Day game kicks off at the optimum time of 3pm at should see a big crowd come to The Grove.

If you can have a bogey team after just a couple of games it would be Carshalton. A clear handball on the line went unpunished in the league fixture, while a stunning comeback saw us knocked out in a bizarre penalty shootout.

With a 2-0 defeat in the game before Christmas, Leatherhead will say their bad form is behind them. Oh yes it is... oh no it isn't...

Folkestone Invicta 2 - 0 Tanners

I missed this game as I made a rare trip watching Southampton away to Huddersfield.  A team that have been revitalised thanks to their new manager, "The Klopp of the Alps".  Meanwhile our very own Mansell of Hastings is struggling to maintain similar form.

Disappointing cup exits gave way to scintillating form, which gave way to crushing defeats, then green shoots of recovery then 2-0 defeats on the road to a side we were showing ambitions of overtaking.

The damage in this game, to make matter worse, was Ian Draycott.  An ex-Leatherhead player who found the net twice, which somehow feels like his goal tally for us in the 2013/14 season.

On to Boxing Day and the arrival of Bubble & Squeak, unwanted relatives and Carshalton Athletic...

Travelling Tanners

Time to avenge probably the worst Leatherhead performance in about 20 years when we travel to Folkestone tomorrow.  The 5-1 thrashing was the icing on a pretty crappy cake, having been just knocked out of the FA Cup the game before.

All eyes will also be on Harlow, following the comments from Spencer football genius Knight.  If Harlow lose (again) I can only imagine it is because he has become distracted with news linking him with the Man United job.

Back to us though.  Directions can be found here.  Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas!

Harlow 2 - 2 Tanners

This Christmas spare a thought for those less fortunate than yourself.

Take poor Spencer Knight for example, the Harlow Town Assistant Manager. 

He thinks we "are probably ones of the worst teams he has seen in 20 years of non-league football."

https://www.youtube.com/embed/wzZ31KgEmiA

Let's look at that statement more closely. Harlow are in the relegation zone, failed to beat us at home and have 7 points less than us. I suggest he sees a worse team than Leatherhead play twice a week every week.

Poor Spencer had a very average football career. He never played league football. His little team only attracted 167 souls yesterday and only average 236.  So this year spare a thought for poor Tiny Spencer and his little club and send him a message of goodwill.

Oh, by the way, Ibrahim and Shaun scored the goals for us today. Shaun now has 9 league goals for the season. Just one behind Jason Prior (who would have got Merstham promoted) and 5 behind the leader Jamie Cureton.   A fine start to the game but Harlow forced their way back into the game, making it 2-2.

Today's draw leaves us rooted to lower mid-table. We travel to Folkestone on Saturday in an attempt to avenge a horrible FA Trophy performance.  If you are desperate to avoid Christmas shopping, or countless relatives arriving from Brazil, you know where to go.

Merstham 0 - 2 Tanners

The outstanding performance of the evening went to Mick Sullivan for insightful interviews with Nikki Bull and Hayden Bird.

The award for most stupid idea went to Merstham for switching the game and keeping the reason secret. I can only think that Hayden Bird is going to see Julian Clary in Snow White at the London Palladium on Wednesday night. Anyway Merstham were suitably punished with a crowd of 138 and a 2-0 defeat. Oh yes they were.

Nikki Bull threw in a new suggestion for the recent poor run during his post match interview. He has almost moved on from blaming the budget (although he stated that was why Charlie was not staying for another month). Apparently we haven't had a training facility for 8 weeks and the players are having to train in Richard Bligh's back garden and get changed in his kitchen. Though I understand Richard is a charming host and makes very nice mince pies.

By all accounts it was a much better performance although, like most others, I wasn't there as I had a prior engagement. Goals came from Shaun and Ibrahim.

The last word goes to Hayden Bird who claimed Merstham would be top of the league is Jason Prior played for them. Now that's a better joke than you will find in any Christmas Cracker. 

Travelling Tanners

Merstham clearly have no interest in European football and rearrange Wednesday's game for tonight.  You could argue we have no interest either as we agreed to it.

Leatherhead will hope to avoid a rather embarrassing mirror image of their November by losing four games in a row after winning four.  Something to reflect on...

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Tanners 0 - 1 Brightlingsea Regent

After three straight defeats, that is the smile well and truly wiped of Nikki Bull's face.  With Leatherhead winning on aggregate 9-1 last season we could perhaps be forgiven for thinking this game was going to be straight forward and, dare I say it, entertaining but the game seemed boring even before kick off.

Something was missing today.  The pre-match music was subdued off the pitch and the likes of Amoo seemed quieter on it.  The visitors played their part by wasting time throughout and had the ref' well and truly sold on their defenders' falling over in the box move.

We huffed and puffed until we were stunned by a Van Basten-esque strike from a tight angle that found the side netting early in the second half.  With few supporters making the trip the goal was greeted by an eerie silence.  The goal was in fact completely missed by one supporter who commented in the car park on the way out that "at least it was a point".  I had to put him right... I had suffered 90 minutes of this crap and I was taking anyone down with me.

Off to Harlow on Saturday.  A chance to sing jingle bells and imagine what fun it would be to win away... or anywhere for that matter!

Brightlingsea Regent

Brightlingsea Regent make the long trip from their sleepy seaside town to face a Leatherhead side they've yet to beat.  

Our last encounter was a strange affair where Jerry got a hat trick by taking a penalty... imagine scoring from a penalty!

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Lewis 1 - 0 Tanners

After all the excitement and hope of 4 straight wins come 2 defeats of our own making.

We lost to Corinthian Casuals through the indiscipline of our players arguing about penalty takers, and the indiscipline of our supporters who would up the opposition. Casuals lost tamely at Wingate today with no opposition supporters to motivate them.

In dreadful conditions today at Lewes, we gave the points away when Zak was beaten to a header at the far post by Will Seager. 

Where do we go from here? Is it down to the lake I fear?