Tanners 3 - 0 Ware

Those that sneer at The FA Trophy in favour of watching a dull game at lowly Ascot United missed out an another excellent Tanners win to make it 5 wins out of 5.

Not just that but we won £2,450 with the chance to win £3,000 in the next round before the National South teams enter.

Not just that but 2 more wins and we could face Leyton Orient or Dagenham.

Not just that but a new song emerged to pay tribute to a former Chairman.

Nikki has shown a fantastic refreshing attitude to the cup competitions compared to a previous regime. He has decided that we may as well try our best to win them!! This new attitude has shown in 2 thoroughly professional and committed performances this week.

From the moment Tommy Wood opened the scoring on just two minutes there was only one winner. Ware never had quite enough to wear us down. Ibrahim added a 2nd on 18 minutes and it could easily have been 3 or 4 by half time. Tommy Wood scored another to make it 3-0 towards the end.

The next round is in just two weeks time. Let's hope for another home draw and more than 225 people to enjoy it.

Ware are coming

Ware arrive to The Grove to face a very much in-form Leatherhead in the Trophy today.

The Trophy is a competition I don't have a lot of love for.  Inevitable  disappointment is just around the corner, as soon as the Conference sides enter.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 5 - 2 Camberley Town

For once Leatherhead played a team two leagues below them and looked the higher placed team in the Surrey Senior Cup.  On too many occasions I have turned up to see 8 or 9 academy players fielded, held together by a handful of senior players that were sulking about having to play at all. 

Nikki got the balance just right.  Woods was not allowed to play but still fielded DSane and Ibz.  Ibz is looking good, too good; recalled to Maidstone good and that showed with his two goals and at least one assist.

DSane got on the score sheet, which I think is important for us moving through the season.

What is important is our penalty record; it simply is not good enough.  I believe we have missed six from nine now as Ibz was the latest victim.  His shot was parried onto the post and reclaimed by the 'keeper.

Jerry was even on the score sheet.  A corner took a deflection and hit Jerry on the knee.  He knew very little about it but enough to laugh to himself as the fortunate strike beat the 'keeper.

Camberley did start brightly; warming the hands of Zak on five minutes, and got a couple of goals but in truth the met a side that was inform and in the mood for the winning run to continue.

FA Trophy it is then on Saturday with the visit of Ware.

Camberley Town are coming

Surrey Senior Cup action tonight and always a tricky one to know what to expect.  On league form, we should win this but I do wonder whether our loaned strikers will be allowed to play and what other changes could be made.

Camberley Town sit in fifth place in the Combined Countries; one of my favourite leagues; only two points off of the top.

Kick off at 7.45.  Season ticket holders can get in for just £8.  See you there!

Tanners 2 - 1 Hornchurch

Leatherhead put down a marker yesterday, they could go toe to toe with the best and get three points.  Past wins were against sides we would hope to beat but this was a step up.

The damage was done in the first half. Woods found space in the centre of goal to fire a low shot into the bottom corner.  He then became provider as his cross found Ibz, as half time approached, to be put away with yet another clinical finish.

The second half became all about the ref and Leatherhead resilience.  Hornchuch scored early in the half to really compound the excitement.

The ref started to emerge as the villain when our defender clipped a Hornchurch winger in a relatively risk free area and booked him.  Moments later, Mensah bursts through the middle of the pitch with the goal and attacking players in front of him when he was brought down.  No yellow card.

Woods had received a push in the back while in the box in the first half.  We assumed the ref felt it was too early in the game and Woods himself did not complain.  In the second half, Jerry was set to head the ball when a defender goes straight through the back of him; two hands on his back.  No penalty.

Meanwhile Leatherhead were trying their best to keep the visitors out.  Brave defending was not enough and Zak was called on at least three time with top class saves.  We forgave him for the heart-in-the-mouth moment of him spilling a ball towards the goal line.

On 90 minutes I wished it was rugby where a gong would sound and we could kick it into touch and celebrate the win.  Alas, we had to suffer five minutes (plus even ore time added on) of tense defending but we held out heroically.

We play in the Surrey Senior Cup on Tuesday... I hope this does not prove to be a distraction from our now fine league form...

Hornchurch are coming

The green shoots of recovery that looked killed off during the night-time frost at Bognor, appear to be in good shape with two fine wins.   The derby game against Merstham being a highlight. 

Beating sides that sit in the bottom half of the table is all well and good, but tomorrow we face a stiffer test in Hornchurch.  Last year they were AFC Hornchurch and finished 15th; rebranded to simply Hornchurch they sit in second.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there.

Merstham 1 - 4 Tanners

Leatherhead put Merstham to the sword yesterday and got rewarded with four goals and three points.  It was clear from the opening minutes that Leatherhead could go on to demolish Merstham yesterday, with our host's defence straining and having to bring in the referee and assistant to help bolster it... a goal ruled out for a dodgy offside and two good shouts for a penalty turned down.

Ibz has returned a much improved player since joining Maidstone and his run of scoring continues as he calmly found the bottom corner.  Woods too has impressed as his powerful shot found the other corner... the ball coming to him via a clear handball (make that three penalty misses, ref).

The officials realised that defending wasn't their forte, so opted to attack and awarded a weak penalty.  With a hand delicately placed on the striker's shoulder, his feet slipped out from under him and the ref could not wait to give it.  2-1.

Travis is back to his best and calmly slotted away our third and off to the tea bar to queue as only one person was working on it, despite the increased crowds on Non-league Day. 

Second half and it was more of the same.  Mensah broke free after performing an outstanding role of controlling midfield and got our fourth.  The ref had given up on Merstham by this point and awarded us an equally laughable penalty, but DSane did the sporting thing and smacked his effort against the post.

The intensity did drop off as substitutions were made but we remained very much in control until the end.  This only left the final whistle and Merstham manager, Barry Hayles (a man who put Southampton out of the League Cup once) to somehow find room to blame the officials and complain for several minutes instead of recognising his own inability to control our attacking formation.

Hornchurch it is Saturday then...

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead hit the road today to play in the Mick Sullivan Derby against our old friends, Merstham.  Our hosts have embraced Non-league Day, with entry just £5 if you are a season ticket holder of another club.

Meanwhile, Leatherhead have received the boost of moral that comes with three points and retaining key loan signings over the past week.

Kick off at 3pm. Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Travelling Tanners

A fine performance on Saturday saw Leatherhead pick up all three points, keep a clean sheet and lift them out of the relegation zone (also, 10 points off of the play-offs).  The loan signings are making the difference, so let's hope they stay a bit longer...

Tonight we have the formidable midweek trip to Margate to contemplate.  I have a Tesco delivery coming so can't make it...

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas.

Cheshunt are coming!

A-ring-a-ding-ding!  Cheshunt come to the Grove today in the league, bringing with them a fans' favourite of Craig Edwards as manager.

Last year's South Central Division playoff winners come to the Grove looking to build on their comfortable start.  Nothing comfortable about our Tuesday night performance but let's hope for a reaction.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas.

Bognor Regis Town 5 - 1 Tanners

I don't think any religious leaders lost any sleep over a second coming on the south coast last night.  Leatherhead's defensive frailties were on show and we were duly punished by our hosts.

The warning signs were there as early as the fifth minute when our defence parted allowing a free shot on goal.  Thankfully the shot was pulled inexplicably wide of the post.

On 11 minutes, Bognor had a corner which resulted in a free header and 1-0.  Eight minutes later they romp down the pitch like the Harlem Globetrotters, full of tricks, while we look like rabbits in the headlights.  2-0.

Now.  The sudden heavy downpour brought water into my house so I was just texting my wife to see if this had been resolved when we started a nice move which found a player out to our left.  I only saw a boot strike the ball and sail perfectly over the 'keeper into the net.  The quality of the finish suggested it was Ibz, but in fact it was Wood.

2-1.  We're back in this... well we were until we could only push the ball out of our box into the path of the in-form Dan Smith who rifled it from distance into the side netting.  3-1.

By now it was obvious we had no midfield at all.  I felt for poor Will Seager who looked rather lost in the centre after being asked to do a job to bolster it.  Any central defender who starts the game as left back then gets moved to central midfield would look lost.  Vigil Van Dyke would look lost.  An out and out defensive midfielder is needed urgently.

Half time needed a chocolate bar in addition to a cup of tea to calm down.  With glucose running giddily through my veins I stepped out looking forward to the second half.  This optimism was almost rewarded as Travis grabbed the game from the scruff of the neck and could have had a couple himself.  Three local kids who stayed down our end for "bants" suddenly didn't fancy it and walked back to join their mates.  The comeback was on...

No, it wasn't.  Leatherhead allowed Bognor Regis to overrun us not once but twice in the same move as a deflected shot was gathered on the goal line and crossed back in for a another headed goal.

At this point I decided to make my way home and enjoy the surprise road closures Bognor Regis had laid on for us.  On the way out I was able to see Ikebusi receive two quick fire yellows and hear the cheer for their fifth as I reached the road.

We were at least spared dropping to the bottom of the table by Corinthian-Casuals inability to retain a lead and Wingate & Finchley being managed by Spencer.  On to Saturday and the visit of Cheshunt...

Travelling Tanners

After celebrating the first win I sat down and took stock of my season so far.  I've realised I haven't been good enough.  I've recycled jokes, been overly sarcastic and not been myself.  It has been difficult though, I've missed games through travel but I am not here to make excuses.  Enough is enough.  My season starts tonight with the trip to Bognor Regis.

Bognor Regis sit just above us on the table and the last time we played them we put four goals past them, beating them 4-0 at their place.  They were the true victors though as their fans stayed and sung until the end...

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Tanners 1 - 0 Bowers Pitsea

Leatherhead get their first win of the season thanks to my positivity and an Olutade goal.

We started brightly.  Travis was causing problems down our right and it was from him we got our goal.  We pounced on a cross and fired powerfully at the 'keeper who could only spill it into the path of Ibz who instinctively headed it home.

Second half and Leatherhead started the game with their trademark laissez faire approach and were it not for an excellent save from Zak we would have conceded.  This was a storm we had to weather for 15 minutes before the sense of inevitability subsided.

Then we looked a decent side again and on two occasions we went narrowly wide of the post.  We also were spared by a ref who adjudged a foul to have occurred outside the box where some may have seen it another way.

Three points in the bag and Nikki can finally be himself again in front of the cameras again.  Bognor Regis Town on Tuesday...

Bowers & Pitsea are coming

I have been told The Lip isn't as positive as it could be.  A little shocked by this I took a look at the table and can announce we are just 11 points off of the play-off places with it all to play for.

That starts, again, tomorrow with the visit of Bowers & Pitsea.  We could have met our new friends last week, but for a last minute goal at Lewes that sent us to penalties in the FA Cup.  Our guests sit in 14th place and have a Third Qualifying Round to look forward to.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Worthing 5 - 5 Tanners

Bloody hell.  What must Leatherhead do to win a game this season?

Some fifteen years ago, Worthing was the venue for my stag-do where my pants were pulled down and I was given a good spanking.  It was that in mind I entered the stadium and the opening few minutes did little to convince we another humiliating good hiding wasn't going to be dished out today.  Yeah, it was some tidy footwork to beat our defender to set up the goal but on two minutes you fear the worst.

Leatherhead did not lie down though and some equally smart move down our right and a good low cross allowed Travis to fire home to make it 1-1.  Hester-Cook guided the ball home from the edge of the area shortly after to make it 2-1 and Worthing looked a little shell-shocked.  The ref too was clearly confused with what was going on and awarded us a penalty for something that was not immediately obvious.  He was too handsome to argue with and so DSane stepped up but scuffed his shot right at the 'keeper.

Leatherhead were really dominating this game and limited Worthing to just two chances.  A pity they scored from both of them as we allowed them to cross and head home with ease.  Nikki Bull was ruddy furious and there is a water bottle that will never see action again.

Second half and it all went off.  Worthing repeated their trick of scoring in the opening minutes and the curse of a complete second half collapse went on, despite Nikki Bull coming out from the dressing room 5 minutes early.  Then Leatherhead came into their own.  A swinging cross found Tommy Wood's head and the ball rocketed into the back of the net. 3-3.  Otulade then broke free and fired the ball into the top corner. 4.3. Tommy Wood repeated his trick, albeit less convincingly as he ball found the net via his neck then shoulder.  They all count.

5-3 the good.  This was it, the first win.  Supporters were so relaxed they argued the subject a former teacher taught at school.  Then, it happened.

A rather harmless ball was aimed into the box but it had a touch of spin that deceived Will Salmon sending it behind him instead of bouncing up onto his chest as he ran onto it.  He had a choice, let it go and try and recover or "innocently" leave the trailing arm out to be struck.  Amazingly he opted for the latter and the statuesque ref awarded the most obvious penalty you will see.  5-4.

At 5-4 the equaliser was just a matter of time and sure enough some balls-up of sorts allowed them to fire a shot through a crowd of players to ruin what would have been a lovely away trip.

As away trips go though it wasn't all that bad.  There was a light festival on the beach, which my wife saw online and insisted on going to.  I bumped into a couple of their fans and it appeared they were as disappointed with a draw as we were.  Ten goals and neither side happy.  First World problems, I guess.  After that the ten goal thriller, Nikki Bull has given the side the weekend off.  No action this week...

Travelling Tanners

Out of the cup, winless and bottom of the league; is a plastic pitch the place to go today?  Probably not, but that's the task at hand when we travel to Worthing today.

Worthing have nine points to their name while Leatherhead have two "new" on-loan signings.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Lewes 2 - 2 Tanners (Lewes win 3-1 on penalties)

We conceded on 5 minutes but heads stayed up and we responded well with D'Sane converting a clear penalty on 18 minutes.

We continued to show great levels of energy. Tommy Wood finishing confidently to put us 2-1 up on 23 minutes. This wasn't the stroll in Tivoli Gardens that Lewes might have expected and it certainly wasn't the place for Little Mermaids. 

The 2nd half was a significant improvement on previous efforts this season. The energy levels and commitment were back to the levels Nikki has been crying out for. Passions were running high with everyone hoping £4,500 would end up in the right hands. 

A stunning save from Zak kept our dreams alive until the last moment of normal time when Lewes equalised with a disputed "was it over the line?" goal. Zak and Will were booked for their protestations making a costly 5 bookings on the night for the Tanners.

We had the best chance of the 1st period when Hester Cook just missed out on converting a One-on-One. Still 2-2 and the 2nd period saw us kicking towards the no-man's-land end. The end nearest the car park as the crow flies but the furthest away when walking as they don't bother to open the gate.

Make that 6 bookings. Our 6th turning from a gentle yellow into a nasty red. Luckily it came with just 7 minutes left before penalties.

Penalties. Lost. Good night.

Travelling Tanners

The first round of "Everywhere we go..." will quietly start at 4pm today, reaching a crescendo on reaching Lewes an hour later when fans step off of the coach wondering why the bloody hell did they get to the ground nearly three hours before kick-off.  This will no doubt be cleared up upon entering the first pub...

On the pitch, Leatherhead are still looking for their first win over 90 minutes.  If the game was only 45 minutes we'd be laughing with 8 points and £4,500 in the bank.

Kick off at 7.45.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 2 - 2 Lewes

Into to the Dripping Pan and out of desire.

Leatherhead squandered a two goal lead to take this tie into a replay.  It was a very different Leatherhead performance in the first half and Lewes looked quite ratted by the new presence upfront we had.  We were positive and threatening which had the Lewes defenders exchanging nervous glances.

The nervous levels rose further as Jerry stepped up for set pieces and his presence paid off with two goals. One seemed to glance off of his shoulder and the other a powerful header that gave the 'keeper no chance.

2-0 and we mused over where we would like to play in the next round.  A nice trip to Weston-super-Mare or Truro... I may even make a weekend of it.  Now, whatever Nikki says at half time he should stop, pull up a chair in the bar with a beer and stay out of it as what happened next was typical of what we have seen this season so far.

It was a completely different team that turned out and Lewes now looked like the confident team.  Tommy Wood who looked so promising now had a touch of the Joe Sheerin about him.  With only three subs there was little inspiration on the bench and when they did come on they appeared a yard off of the pace.

The result was an emphatic Lewes comeback as they pulled the two goals back with little resistance.  In the dying minutes a powerful shot looked destined to send us crashing out of the cup, but fortunately it crashed against the post and bounced safely away.

Wednesday night for the replay.  I'm in Copenhagen so will miss all the fun...

Lewes are coming. Again.

As so often is the case, a cup fixture follows with the same opposition you have shortly faced (or will face) in the league and so that is tomorrow.  Lewes were a side that looked ripe for the picking but that was overlooking just how bloody poor we have been this season.

The shenanigans off the pitch no doubt played a major part in this.  Bland club statements and stiff-upper lip can only take you so far when you then let a few things slip to the local press.

On to tomorrow we go then.  A flurry of new signings and the prospect of winning and keeping some FA Cup prize money (I meant due to having registered players, obviously) will hopefully lift the side.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!