Sunday, September 20, 2026

Ks 0 - 1 Tanners

This was a rare game where the “home” supporters had a trickier journey than the away ones. The only person to endure a more difficult trip was The Lip’s Marcel Barrington, who turned up at Ashford United in Kent believing Ks ground-shared there. Give it a season, Marcel, and you may yet be right…

 

Onto the game, and it soon became clear Ks had not come out to play football so much as foul their way into the next round. Braiden Hall was the first victim and had to be subbed off after just 13 minutes. Then, on the half-hour, the referee effectively gave them the green light to carry on. Dickson went in for a tackle and was slightly late, but the referee appeared to allow play to continue; then, as the ball fell to Mark, he received a heavy challenge with a high elbow. Despite the blood now flowing from his forehead, the referee pulled it back to the original foul and only awarded Dickson the yellow.

 

Combined with dramatic yelping whenever they were touched, Ks had the better of the first half and hit the crossbar twice, but we survived and went in to regroup at 0-0.

 

The second half saw a Leatherhead side more prepared for the dirty tactics, and we took the lead. The referee awarded us a free kick on the edge of the box — having ignored what looked like a penalty in a similar area moments earlier — and Price smashed it into the top corner after the ball had bounced around the area for a while. 1-0.

 

Then it all kicked off. Similar to the incident last weekend, a Ks player came to challenge Price but met him instead with two raised hands and a forceful shove to the ground. A melee erupted and, in the middle of it, Ks’ No. 8 threw a punch at Kennett. One assistant saw it and the referee produced a red card. The other assistant then told the referee that Kennett had done something in the build-up and so he was shown a yellow. That booking meant that, when Kennett was later involved in another foul, the entire Ks bench ran onto the pitch trying to get him sent off.

 

Strangely, going 1-0 down finally persuaded Ks to start playing football and, despite being a man down, they continued to play out from the back in a style that would have made Russell Martin proud. Most of the time the ball was picked off and we could attack again, but there were moments when they looked dangerous.

 

There was still time for yet more controversy as both teams ended up seeing red. Hogan had something brewing with their No. 16 and, in a challenge for the ball in the left corner, was robustly shoved off it by the bigger player. As the ball moved on, Hogan chased and gave his adversary a reminder that he was still there, and the defender reacted. He got Nathan in a neck lock, as if he were Hulk Hogan, and wrestled him to the ground. You could still see the marks on his neck five minutes later. Another bout of handbags followed, and the Ks ‘keeper sprinted to the halfway line, got involved with Cam, went down theatrically, and so our defender also saw red.

 

It was now nine v ten, and Ks won a free kick on the edge of the box in stoppage time, but the effort sailed high and wide. The final whistle blew, another fight broke out, and a Ks child allegedly ran off with one of our footballs. All of that somehow distracted from the one thing that mattered: we are through to the next round.

 

Onto Tuesday, when we play Three Bridges, who refreshingly play in Three Bridges.

Saturday, September 19, 2026

Travelling Tanners

There is no day more exciting than FA Cup Day, as we travel to our old friends Kingstonian.  This will mean a trip to Ashford as that is what they call home this year.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Tuesday, September 15, 2026

AFC Whyteleafe are coming!

AFC Whyteleafe, fresh from their 4-0 win at the weekend, come to The Grove for tonight’s league fixture. Our guests will look to try and keep themselves out of the relegation zone, while we hope to cement ourselves in the playoff positions. I’ll be flying in from Estonia, but unlikely to make it to the game in time. Kick off at 7.45pm. Good luck fellas.

Saturday, September 12, 2026

Aveley 1 - 2 Tanners

The away form of the mighty travelling Tanners continued with a fantastic hardworking team performance on the wrong side of the Dartford Tunnel (check that you paid the toll). On the other hand the referee was dreadful. I can’t remember ever seeing a player run 30 yards off the ball to elbow one of our players to the ground and only receive a yellow. He needs to get a new hobby, or work his way back down the levels so he can referee at Westfield. The newish Aveley ground - built in 2017 - is impressive if a little sterile and lacking in character. Talking of sterile - after all the high fives at the end of the game - Carex products will be in high demand. Aveley started the game strongly and got an early goal after 5 minutes. After this shock we settled into the game and started to create some chances. Anas - who is now joint top league goal scorer with 6 - pounced on a loose ball at close range to send us into the break on level terms. It was a dogged second half as well, but better than arriving in Tallinn 2 days later than planned due to broken Britain’s ATC systems. This Tanners side has great attitude and fitness and it paid off on 67’ when Anas slid the ball past the keeper for the winner. Despite Aveley pressure we hung on to bag all 3 points. Onto Tuesday and the chance to win a league game at home v Whyteleafe. Vamos!!

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead make the trip to Aveley today, in a close game as they sit above us on goal difference.

Meanwhile, I get to sing “oh, Leva, Leva. Leva, leva, leva Levadia in Estonia.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.   Good luck fellas!

Sunday, September 06, 2026

Tanners 3 - 0 AFC Croydon Athletic

With an FA Cup tie ahead and good weather forecast, I decided to cycle to the game yesterday, spending a little time beforehand cleaning and oiling the chain. It proved a fitting start to the afternoon: my bike purred smoothly up and over Ranmore Common, and Leatherhead approached the game in much the same way — quietly, efficiently, and always in control.

 

The last time our visitors were here, I leaned heavily into the Stormzy references, but I resisted the temptation this time as there was no sign whatsoever of him or co-owner Zaha. They did not even have a shirt sponsor, which felt slightly odd given the profile of the club’s owners.

 

As for the game itself, Leatherhead struck early. Dicko let fly from around 20 yards out on the left, and with the goalkeeper overcommitted to covering his far post, the ball flew in through the near one. 0-1.

 

AFC Croydon Athletic’s keeper, Amadou, played for Leatherhead not so long ago, and I did wonder if he still had a soft spot for us. He certainly seemed to have a soft spot in his gloves, because in the second half Murphy hit a powerful effort straight at him, only for it to squirm through his hands and drift into the far corner. 2-0.

 

We thought we had a third when The Lip’s Barrington launched a long throw that bounced in via the far post. Cam Black celebrated as though he had got the touch, and it initially looked as though the referee had given it. Somehow, though, the assistant intervened, and apparently as he had not seen a touch through a crowd of players it was enough to rule it out.

 

The AFC Croydon Athletic manager’s post-match interview suggested the better team lost and that his side had controlled the game. Personally, I suspect that was all part of the plan. Leatherhead were happy to let them have the ball in safe areas and then catch them on the break. That was certainly how it played out in the closing minutes, when Hall was sent clean through the middle and calmly slotted away his one-on-one chance. You certainly cannot blame the keeper for that one.

 

Safely through to the second qualifying round, and now a trip to Aveley on Saturday awaits…

Saturday, September 05, 2026

AFC Croydon Athletic are coming!

FA Cup action returns as we welcome AFC Croydon Athletic to The Grove today.  We last played this side two years ago was in a friendly where we drew 1-1 and I perhaps over did it with the Stormzy references.

 

Our guests play in the Isthmian South East division and sit just outside the play-off places with two wins and two losses.

 

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Monday, August 31, 2026

Tanners 2 - 3 Dulwich Hamlet

Leatherhead’s players could not match the speed and accuracy of the bar service at the new pop-up bar as they succumbed to their second home defeat of the season.

 

The contrast between home and away defensive performances remains a growing concern. Eight goals conceded in three home games compared with just three away tells its own story.

 

The original linesman appeared to have chosen a village fair over an afternoon at Fetcham Grove and, much like one of our supporters, dropped out at the last minute. Thankfully, a late replacement stepped in — a chap resembling Brian Murphy, who saved the day. He was not exactly overworked, though, and his main contribution was to rule out one of our goals for offside. For the rest of the match, he mostly seemed to wait for the referee’s decision and then agree with it.

 

Leatherhead started the brighter side, but after Dulwich had offered very little for the opening 25 minutes, they were handed a soft penalty. One of their players was judged to have been brought down by Sonny, even though the ball had already gone out for a corner.

 

That left Leatherhead 0-1 down at half-time, which must at least have made it easier for the absent to focus on the craft stalls and the “better than ever” dog show.

 

The second half began with Leatherhead firing on all cylinders. Nathan turned back the clock to last season with a free-kick whipped into the bottom corner, leaving Hudson Sands — on loan from Chelsea and contracted until 2029 — rooted to the spot. If Alonso watches the highlights tonight, he may be tempted to loan him to Westfield at Step 8 instead.

 

Leatherhead were well on top when Kofi’s deflected shot put them into the lead. Then it all unravelled. Dulwich introduced five substitutes, all with pace and power, while Leatherhead looked to be running out of legs. Two of those subs went on to score — the equaliser arriving on 71 minutes when Sonny was lobbed, and the winner in the 92nd minute when a cross was not dealt with.

 

Ten points from the first six games is probably a couple fewer than performances have deserved.

 

FA Cup action follows next week but, more importantly, does anyone know who won the “Best Young Dog Handler” award at Peaslake Fair..?

Dulwich Hamlet are coming!

Old friends , Dulwich Hamlet travel to visit us today, for a Bank Holiday fixture that could see a big crowd at The Grove. While it’s been eight years since we played them in the league, it was only two years ago we beat 1-0 in the FA Cup. Kick off at 3pm. See you there!