Saturday, April 05, 2025

Uxbridge 10 - 0 Tanners

If Uxbridge were accused of over celebrating 10 days ago, today they over-scored as they took full advantage of a completely gutless display from a well-backed Leatherhead side.

 

I can't describe many of these goals.  Firstly, I am too disappointed and secondly, I missed half of them.  Two goals spring to mind though.  Their first goal came after Uxbridge's No 4 misplaced a pass and we gained possession.  Rather than build anything we played an lazy ball forward that was intercepted and they went on to score for their possession.  Their fourth goal came from our corner and a good ball in needed someone braze to get a head on it.  Bravery wasn't on the table today and he pulled his head away and Uxbridge marched up the pitch and score.

 

No head injuries for Uxbridge today.  That would need us to get near enough to touch them; not a bit of it as our hosts cruised around in second gear.

 

Into the bar at half time and some light relief as we watch the Grand National.  Oh, how I wished someone would come out onto the pitch and set a tent around the stricken Leatherhead team and put us out of our misery as it was about to get a lot worse.  By the time I emerged from the bar, walked past Sonny Wheeler who was enjoying a kebab, and got to the half way line it was 5-0.

 

We did dispatch a few shots – one shot even hit the bar – but in reality Uxbridge were not coming out to tread water and went on to score another five – five! - goals.   You can point to not having oour first choice 'keeper in goal, but if that is really the case you should be working harder to protect him, but I saw precious little of that.

 

Miracles do happen, but with our impressive goal difference affectively halved it is going to take a lot to make the play-offs now…

Travelling Tanners

A chance to reacquaint ourselves with housery and over-celebrating of Uxbridge today. With a coach going, this should exceed their (checks notes) 171 average home attendance.

Kick off at 3pm. See. You. There!

Saturday, March 29, 2025

Tanners 3 - 2 Ks

29 March used to have the special meaning for me as my wedding anniversary: 21 years today.  Scrap that, it is now 0 years since we scored in the 97th minute to beat Ks and keep our chances of finishing in a play-off place alive.

 

It did not look like it was going to turn out that way from the first 20 minutes as we started much like we did against Farnham; like meek rabbits caught in the headlights.  Any hopes of blundering our way through it faded when a ball into the box took a wicked deflection off Cameron Black and went in on just six minutes.

 

Leatherhead did not take the early punch well and staggered about on the ropes for a further 14 minutes until something clicked.  Suddenly Leatherhead were relentless and sending in shots from all over the place.  The opening goal came from a brief period of head-tennis and eventually Cameron Black was at hand to head home to atone for his own goal.

 

Just two minutes later our pressure resulted in another goal.  Some nice build-up play down our left got the ball into Alfie Huckle in the box who sent in a powerful shot into the bottom right corner.  A defender dived and used his hand to try and save it, but it found the side netting to spare him a red card.  We should have really scored more but we ended the half 2-1.

 

Second half, for 40 minutes was a fairly even and tame affair.  Then it all happened.  Ks had been growing in the game for some time now but we had largely managed to hold them at bay.  Then we found ourselves with a player one on one with the 'keeper to make it 3-1… his shot was too near the 'keeper not once but twice and the chance was lost.

 

As we entered stoppage time, Ks launched what they hoped would be the last attack of the game as the referee saw a foul and signalled a penalty.  Wheeler guessed the wrong way and at 2-2 it looked like our season was over.  The referee allowed play to go beyond the four minutes signalled to allow Leatherhead to attack from the restart.  After a couple of false starts we broke with the ball down the middle… that went left and then right to Everitt who smashed it into the top right corner.  3-2.  Limbs.

 

When the whistle came, more wild scenes followed as our players – Uxbridge, please take note – celebrated in front of their supporters rather than goad the away support.   Onto Saturday then, when we reacquaint ourselves with Uxbridge again…

Ks are coming

Former-tenants Ks come to the Grove today for this Surrey derby. The club lost to their current hosts in the week, so no doubt they will be looking to bounce back strongly.

A closely contested away game ended 1-1 earlier in the season.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Wednesday, March 26, 2025

Tanners 0 - 1 Uxbridge

Leatherhead's good form came crashing down, last night, as Uxbridge did a bit of number on us.

 

Overall, Leatherhead looked quite good.  We were attacking but Uxbridge always managed to stick out a foot and block a shot for crucial pass, to snuff out any chance we had.  The best coming from a corner, where a deflection seemed to beat the 'keeper to score an own goal but there was a foot to save the defender's blushes.

 

Uxbridge's goal was therefore disappointing.  It appeared we had dealt with an Uxbridge attack, only to lose the ball again and set up a shot from the edge of the box.  It was a speculative as it was under hit but its accuracy was enough to beat the diving Wheeler.

 

The second half spung into life and the referee tried his best to give us the win with a sending off and a soft penalty.  The player that won the penalty celebrated a bit too much, it hadn't been scored yet and the sheer size of the 'keeper must have been daunting.  As soon as Kane hesitated in his run up, the 'keeper already had half a glove on it.  He guessed correctly and saved with ease.

 

Down to ten men, Uxbridge seemed to suffer a series of head injuries that needed treatment and for the game to stop.  So prolific was their misfortune, Sir Chris Whitty was seen setting up for a press conference to explain the sudden pandemic and what could be done to stop the spread of the condition.  Ultimately blowing the final whistle was enough, as their players we able to robustly over-celebrate in front of our supporters rather than acknowledge the travels of their handful of fans that made the trip.

 

Onto Saturday, where we face K's who had their own taste of disappointment last night…

Tuesday, March 25, 2025

Uxbridge are coming!

I couldn't make Saturday's game, away at Badshot Lea, as I was taking my daughter to an "experience day" at Winchester Uni.  While this made me feel my age, an early goal helped keep the grey hairs at bay as we went on to win 4-0.

 

Tonight, will be a very different challenge as third place Uxbridge come to The Grove.  They come eighth in the form league, having lost 4-2 to Rayners Lane at the weekend.

 

Kick-off at 7.45pm.  See you there!

Saturday, March 22, 2025

Travelling Tanners

Non League Day brings a trip to bottom-of-the-table, Badshot Lea. Looking at the other fixtures, this could be quite the opportunity to put even more pressure on fifth spot… or a massive banana skin…

Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas!

Wednesday, March 19, 2025

Hanworth Villa 0 - 1 Tanners

Ian Selley did his homework for this game and was awarded a distinction by teacher as Leatherhead smashed and grabbed 3 points at the division's in form team.

Villa had won 6 of their last 7 league games using various housery tactics such as banning supporters from behind one of the goals for no apparent reason, and removing all grass from the playing surface such as to resemble a test match wicket at Faisalabad.

With only 9 games left and 8 points behind the hosts this was a must win, but the gaffer set out with a seemingly must not lose 5-5-0 formation. This restricted both sides to very few chances with a lot of head tennis and hoofing. 

There were no health scares in the first half and thankfully we were still all clear at half time. The most entertaining moment coming when Martin Lewis, on TV in the club house, advised everyone on the best savings rates. Monument Bank 4.75% per annum max 3 withdrawals per annum.

In the second half, the referee continued to look like he had been called up from the local Sunday league with a series of incorrect decisions. Just as it looked like no one would score if we played all night, Ian Selley pulled a rabbit out of the hat and changed formation with the introduction of Ruben with 15 minutes remaining.

Suddenly we were all over Hanworth and had 3 good chances but it was the old warhorse "Pearcy" who leapt like a salmon at the far post on 93 minutes. Absolute. Limbs. Even Mick sounded upbeat during the post match interview.

Our next match is against the bottom side whilst Hanworth and Hartley both have tough fixtures. 8 games left 5 points adrift. Dare we dream…………

Tuesday, March 18, 2025

Travelling Tanners!

A trip to Feltham awaits tonight, for what is surely a drink at the Last Chance Saloon. For a second we were within four points, then you blink and the table looks completely different.

Our hosts, Hanworth Villa, are sitting three points better off than they were on 89 minutes, at the weekend. Two late goals push them up into the coveted last play-off place.

Kick off at 7.45. Good luck fellas!

Sunday, March 16, 2025

Tanners 1 - 0 Sutton Common Rovers

A well worn out cliché would be to call this a game of two halves.  If you're a Leatherhead supporter, you may be forgiven fall calling it a game of just one as the action of the first half all but evaporated in the second.

 

From the off, we were looking like we were in a scoring mood.  Our midfielders were finding space and time on the ball, giving our guests plenty to think about.  We scored early, but the ref saw a little too much physicality from Cameron Black and gave a foul.

 

Our goal was a thing of beauty.  Ruben put through Akinnibi who ran on with only the 'keeper in front of him.  How many times would we have seen a Leatherhead player panic and hit it straight at the 'keeper?  Not Akinnibi, who calmly pushed the ball past the shot stopper and slotted it into the back of the net.

 

Leatherhead supporters now settled in for a goalfest as surely the floodgates will open now.  This was a gross miscalculation and the rest of the game, the second half in particular, became very hard to watch.

 

I cannot stress enough how bad the second half was.  Absolutely resolute in defence, which is to be applauded, but I was pleased it was all over.  Meanwhile Hanworth Villa spoilt our party with two goals in the 90thand 95th minute to win and stretch the play-off places to eight points…  that will come to a head when we play them on Tuesday…

Saturday, March 15, 2025

Sutton Common Rovers are coming!

Today we face Sutton Common Rovers on a sodding cold Saturday, as we look to keep pressure on the play-off places.

Luke Tuff's Ashford couldn't repeat their heroics of beating RVP against Hayes & Yeading, so the gap is now 9 point with 10 games to go.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Wednesday, March 12, 2025

Redhill 0 - 0 Tanners (Tanners win 5-3 on penalties)

History told me that this game had all the elements to be a painful watch.  A cup game, against lower-league opposition, on cold night and away… and I was right.  Not even the last minute discovery that the New Ground Klaxon was sounding for me could numb the sense of impending doom I felt.

 

The mood was raised on the arrival of a Fish and Chip van, but the act of stuffing my face and subsequently having to wash it meant I missed the only real incident of the game.  The Redhill 'keeper dived to smooth a ball and Ty got their late and stamped on the shot stopper.  Straight red.  60 minutes of even harder to watch football now on the cards.

 

Leatherhead simply couldn't do anything right.  Pump it long and they won the header and back it came.  Attempt to pass it around on the ground, and the bobbly pitch also played straight into their hands.  We were pegged back and had to clear off the line on a couple of occasions.

 

Last ten minutes we did get some form of foothold in the game and apply some pressure but in all honesty, we were relieved to get to penalties.  For once we held our nerve and made all of our attempts count, while Redhill missed their fourth, to send us into the semi-final.

 

Now onto Saturday where we return our focus on the league and the visit of Sutton Common Rovers…

Tuesday, March 11, 2025

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead travel to the wonderfully named Kiln Brow tonight, to play Redhill in the Surrey Senior Cup.

Our hosts won't make this Quarter Final easy for us, as form must count for something; they sit on top of the Combined Counties.

Kick off at 7.45. See you there!

Sunday, March 09, 2025

Raynes Park Vale 1 - 1 Tanners

game was every bit as hard fought as you would expect it to be and, on balance, a point was probably a fair result.

 

Raynes Park Vale had the better of the first half and it wasn't long before they opened the scoring.  Omarr Lawson saw sight of goal, on the edge of the box, and drove his shot into the bottom corner.

 

We nearly equalised in spectacular fashion when Ruben chased a long bouncing ball under pressure from two defenders.  He improvised a lob from over his shoulder, which beat the 'keeper but struck the top of the bar.

 

We built up a bit of pressure from a string of corners and someone must have said something to Tyler Cox as he took the bait.  It wasn't so long ago we were at this ground to see him rotting on the bench for Ks, before we gave him a chance, but that counted for nothing as he hurled insults back.

 

Then our goal.  It was a bit scrappy, and I thought the chance had gone when Ruben's initial shot was smothered by a defender, but the ball ricocheted around the box until Kane could smash it into the bottom corner.

 

The second half started and at times it was hard to see the goal at the far end through the smoke from the tasty BBQ chicken stall.  Despite our players inhaling the best part of a chicken thigh each, they went on to have the best of this half in terms of pressure.  Our best chance fell to Ruben, who opted to cross rather than take a shot on goal from an angle.

 

The final whistle eventually came and I am not sure how much good a point does either side… but we will have to worry about that next week as we have the Surrey Senior Cup to concentrate on with a trip to Redhill on Tuesday…

Saturday, March 08, 2025

Travelling Tanners

The big one. It was already a big game but throw in Hayden's arrival - followed by many ex-Leatherhead players - it got slightly bigger.

The reverse fixture saw an ex-Leatherhead player score against us in a game we were largely bullied. Today, if they score it will be difficult to find a player that didn't used to play for us to do it.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Wednesday, March 05, 2025

Tanners 1 - 0 Guernsey

A very different game to the one on Saturday, where Guernsey arrived from Gatwick airport and parked their coach on the edge of the penalty box.  Huff, puff and controversy were the order of the day…

 

Leatherhead worked hard for this win.  It was clear that they were not going to have the freedom they had enjoyed at the weekend, but in the first half they tried to get a breakthrough but rarely threatened.  We got a bit lucky too, with corner decisions, as we were awarded one that came off of our player and Guernsey were denied one that seemed to be kicked out from our defender.

 

Any good will towards the officials for their awarding of corners soon evaporated when they gave Pearce a straight red for violent conduct.  A replay does not show any significant contact, but the referee saw an elbow so we were down to ten men.

 

Guernsey now grew in confidence and wanted to return to the island with all three points.  This created a bit more space for our attacking players and we too went on the hunt for a goal.  


The goal came via a penalty, when our player drove into the box and was caught in a clumsy pincer defence where two players attempted to tackle but missed.  Despite the 'keeper guessing the right way, Kane's shot was too powerful, and the ball hit the back of the net with fragments of glove on it.

 

Guernsey upped their push for a goal even more, and when Ruben was retreated to the bench we had no real outlet so the ball kept coming back to us for the last six minutes of stoppage time.  Finally, the referee blew his whistle to signal a fine win and for once results went our way, to leave us just four points behind.  Saturday just got bigger…

Tuesday, March 04, 2025

Guernsey are coming!

The plane took off, so providing they didn't miss it we are good to go tonight.

An interesting array of games being played tonight, so no doubt people will be looking at their phones… hopefully the team will concentrate on the three points.

Kick off at 7.45. See you there!

Sunday, March 02, 2025

Tanners 3 - 0 Ascot

Ascot simply didn't turn up at the races today, as Leatherhead notched up an impressive 3-0 win today to take us to within seven points of the play-off places.

 

Leatherhead opened the scoring quickly and decisively, when Kane brought the ball down in midfield to evade his defender and find Rhys out on the right.  Rhys rode his luck on beating his marker, but expertly bent a shot into the side netting.  1-0.

 

It was soon 2-0, when a corner found Pearce at the back post who headed back into a dangerous area where Akinnibi could smash it into the same corner as we had scored moments earlier.

 

The third goal could have come on four occasions in the remainder of the first half; the closest where a cross became a Ronaldinho lob but hit the bar.  Ascot did finish this half strongly but Sonny was largely untroubled.

 

The second half and it was only six minutes before we did get our third and ultimately made the game safe.  The ball popped up in the box with Ruben in close terms with the 'keeper but his improvised shot sneaked into the goal.

 

At this point Ascot decided it wasn't going to be the day and both sides decided to tread water until the final whistle.  A fine win which takes us into Tuesday when Guernsey hope to make the long awaited trip to The Grove… expect low-flying fog then…

Saturday, March 01, 2025

Ascot are coming!

The reverse fixture ended in controversy when a provoked moment of madness cost us all three points, at a time when we were stringing some wins together.

Our guests have gone on to be in a good position in the playoff places while our chances look to have faded. Could a win change that today…?

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Sunday, February 23, 2025

Farnham 2 - 1 Tanners

Leatherhead started this match like 11 rabbits caught in the headlights and meekly allowed Farnham to control the game and race to a 2-0 lead.  The three-goal-lead rule looked likely to be enforced by as early as 25 minutes, and allow me to rejoin my family in town.

 

Somehow, we managed to hold on; but Farnham's towering number five managed to walk off with his pristine white shorts and boots intact as he had no defending to do.

 

The second half we showed up and least held them at bay… well, apart from them hitting the woodwork twice and forcing Sonny into a fine save.  Then, as we approached six minutes of stoppage time we did the unthinkable and scored.  We had started to build a bit of pressure in the final ten minutes but Ruben made it interesting with a low strike on the edge of the box.

 

From nowhere, Leatherhead had created genuine excitement to the game.  The best chance came when we one a freekick, about three yards outside the box.  The powerful shot forced a save from our former 'keeper but no one could follow up.

 

The final whistle blew, and Farnham's No 7 over celebrated towards a large travelling contingent that had barely noticed him all game.  Losing 5-3 on aggregate doesn't seem to be anything I would be too proud of, so only he knows why that was necessary.

 

Onto Tuesday then, and the visit of fourth place Uxbridge…

Saturday, February 22, 2025

Travelling Tanners

Game on! Despite overnight rain, an early pitch inspection is passed and we have a game on.

Worryingly, our hosts absolutely destroyed Ks midweek and no doubt the score line from our home tie will be on the dressing room wall.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Friday, February 21, 2025

Tanners 2 - 2 Hendon (3-4 on penalties)

Leatherhead heroically bow out of the League Cup after taking Hendon all the way to penalties but fell short from the spot.

 

Hendon arrived at the Grove with a relatively strong side, albeit with only three players on the bench and their top striker rested.  That didn't stop them scoring first, when their player hit a volley over our 'keeper and into the side netting from a tight angle.

 

Hendon are at the wrong end of the table and so have their own defensive frailties to deal with, which Ty exposed by running onto a through-ball and tucking it between the legs of the young 'keeper.  1-1.

 

Overall, Leatherhead looked the better side and on 65 minutes they got a stunning second goal when Niran Butler let fly from 25 to 30 yards out; an unstoppable shot that arrowed directly into the top right-hand corner.

 

We could dream of a famous win but Hendon started to apply real pressure and pegged us back with a swift move in the box and a cool finish.  Onto penalties…

 

The first two round of penalties were scored, but Marco's effort was saved and Hendon scored to make it 2-3.  2-3 soon became 3-4 and Kane stepped up needing to score.  He opted a confident chip down the middle but completely undercooked it.  The 'keeper, who dived to his left, had time to get up and simply bat it away.  So under hit was the shot, I wonder if the 'keeper was even needed and the ball would have landed in front of the line and span backwards… we will never know.

 

No semi-final for us… but also, no long trip to Chatham… time to focus on Saturday and the much talked about trip to Farnham…

Tuesday, February 18, 2025

Hendon are coming!

League Cup action tonight and the arrival of old friends, Hendon. Down from their lofty Isthmian Premier League heights… although they are in the relegation zone.

Kick off at 7.45pm. See you there!

Monday, February 17, 2025

Tanners 3 - 0 Harrow Borough

For a game between two similarly placed teams, this was as one sided as it could get.  For the first half we controlled the game without much end result, but it all came together in the second.

 

With Lukas injured, it left Ruben as the main striker with Marco playing alongside him.  Ruben should have put us 1-0 when a cross found him on the edge of the six-yard box but he mistimed his strike while under pressure from a defender.  He later managed to get his head on a difficult cross but could only get the ball to land on the roof of the net.  We also hit the bar from a long range shot.

 

The second half we took our chances… not before Ruben missed a clear chance to open the scoring.  He received the ball about 10 yards out with only the 'keeper between him and the goal.  His touch was perfect to allow him to pick his spot; unfortunately, that spot was just wide of the right-hand post.

 

Then the goals came.  First from our captain, Kane, who received the ball on the edge of the box but surrounded by four players.  A step to the left and a timely drag-back sent all players in the wrong direction, which created enough space for a curling shot up and over the 'keeper.  The full majesty of this goal could not be seen from behind the goal, but the official footage is a joy to behold.

 

The second goal was fortunate as it was clinical.  Anuar Ceesay received the ball about 25 yards out and his attempt to control it saw the ball bound up and strike his arm which, unintentionally, created the perfect touch to now allow him to advance on goal.  With the referee's view obscured and the assistant only prepared to say "yes ref" and not make a decision of his own, Anuar advanced on goal and powered a low shot into the bottom right corner.

 

Then Ruben was set free and got his goal.  I'm hoping he saw the 'keeper stood with his legs slightly apart and his decision to fire it directly at him was a calculated move, but it worked and a satisfying 3-0 scoreline went up.

 

No major scares down the other end.  All in all, a good day.. except for all of the other sides above us winning so we are no better off.  Next up, the League Cup and the visit of Hendon on Tuesday…

Saturday, February 15, 2025

Harrow Borough are coming!

A string of crucial league games is upon us, as we take on a number of sides between us and the playoff places, and we start with the visit of Harrow Borough.

Our guests sit two places above us, the points to the good but with an inferior goal difference.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Sunday, February 09, 2025

Rayners Lane 3 - 5 Tanners

Leatherhead played out a high-scoring and entertaining game today against a spirited side that played much of the game with ten men.

 

After an agonising car journey, I arrived at the new ground to see that it posed a number of problems.  There was very little in the way of cover and yet again you couldn't get behind one goal but the introduction of "loaded jerk chicken chips" more than made up for this.

 

Rayners Lane could have opened the scoring with a good chance just as I put my order in for the Caribbean-based dish, but the striker mistimed his shot.  Some five minutes later, Lukas was put clear through on goal and he slid the ball past the 'keeper.  I missed this as I anxiously looked inside the tea-bar's hatch, while looking for signs of my food.

 

Then the ref stepped in to change the game.  Rayners Lane were awarded a free kick in their own half, and with Leatherhead pressing it was difficult to find a free man.  Their No 4 stood over the ball, hesitated a bit, faked a pass and then attempt to play the ball just as the referee blew his whistle and issued a card for time wasting.  Moments later, our defender was fouled while clearing a ball.  The referee blew his whistle just as the long ball fell to their No 4 and he instinctively cleared the ball, although slicing it into touch.  The referee thought this was petulant and issued a second yellow and then a red.  The harshest application I have seen of these laws not once but twice in just a few minutes.

 

With only ten men, Rayners Lane were ripe for the picking, right?  On the stroke of halftime, a ball found a player unmarked at the back post and he fired it into the goal from close range.  1-1.

 

In the second half, Leatherhead looked in rampant mood.  On just 51 minutes Anuar Ceesay, who had been outstanding in the first half, was slotted though and made it 2-1.  Just six minutes later, Rhys beat the offside trap (just) and made it 3-1.  Then on 65 minutes, Ruben was brought down in the box for Fitzgerald to fire home the penalty.  4-1.

 

At this point I turned to the people near me and confidently said "there is no way we can muck this up from here".  Just then the sky was filled with a flurry of colour as a pandemonium of parrakeets filled the skies and a chaos of Leatherhead played out in the pitch.  Twice the 10 men of Rayners Lane scored in the last few minutes from close range Luckily, Ty Butler added a fifth goal to our tally, making my earlier confidence feel slightly more justified.

 

An eventful day, but now we get ready to host Harrow (pitch permitting) on Tuesday…

Saturday, February 08, 2025

Rayners Lane 2 - 5 Tanners

Leatherhead played out a high-scoring and entertaining game today against a spirited side that played much of the game with ten men.

 

After an agonising car journey, I arrived at the new ground to see that it posed a number of problems.  There was very little in the way of cover and yet again you couldn't get behind one goal but the introduction of "loaded jerk chicken chips" more than made up for this.

 

Rayners Lane could have opened the scoring with a good chance just as I put my order in for the Caribbean-based dish, but the striker mistimed his shot.  Some five minutes later, Lukas was put clear through on goal and he slid the ball past the 'keeper.  I missed this as I anxiously looked inside the tea-bar's hatch, while looking for signs of my food.

 

Then the ref stepped in to change the game.  Rayners Lane were awarded a free kick in their own half, and with Leatherhead pressing it was difficult to find a free man.  Their No 4 stood over the ball, hesitated a bit, faked a pass and then attempt to play the ball just as the referee blew his whistle and issued a card for time wasting.  Moments later, our defender was fouled while clearing a ball.  The referee blew his whistle just as the long ball fell to their No 4 and he instinctively cleared the ball, although slicing it into touch.  The referee thought this was petulant and issued a second yellow and then a red.  The harshest application I have seen of these laws not once but twice in just a few minutes.

 

With only ten men, Rayners Lane were ripe for the picking, right?  On the stroke of halftime, a ball found a player unmarked at the back post and he fired it into the goal from close range.  1-1.

 

In the second half, Leatherhead looked in rampant mood.  On just 51 minutes Anuar Ceesay, who had been outstanding in the first half, was slotted though and made it 2-1.  Just six minutes later, Rhys beat the offside trap (just) and made it 3-1.  Then on 65 minutes, Ruben was brought down in the box for Fitzgerald to fire home the penalty.  4-1.

 

At this point I turned to the people near me and confidently said "there is no way we can muck this up from here".  Just then the sky was filled with a flurry of colour as a pandemonium of parrakeets filled the skies and a chaos of Leatherhead played out in the pitch.  Twice the 10 men of Rayners Lane scored in the last few minutes from close range Luckily, Ty Butler added a fifth goal to our tally, making my earlier confidence feel slightly more justified.

 

An eventful day, but now we get ready to host Harrow (pitch permitting) on Tuesday…

Travelling Tanners

For the second weekend running the NEW GROUND KLAXON sounds as we travel to Rayners Lane.

The last two results have been difficult to watch and take; while we also lose Tyler to RVP. Let's hope the new signing slots in well.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Wednesday, February 05, 2025

Tanners 1 - 2 Westfield

The Westfield curse hits again, as we lose and cement ourselves in a midtable position.

 

This was not a pretty game to watch.  Westfield came with a well-executed game plan and managed to slow the game down when needed; twice a substitution was called without the player coming on being ready.

 

The first half started off slow but for the last ten minutes we were very much on top.  If Leatherhead's strikers rocked up at a coconut shy, they would clear up as three good chances were shot straight at the 'keeper.  Then we got our goal.  For the second game, Ruben turned provider by chasing a ball and feeding in Lukas who found the back of the net.  For the second time, Ruben was withdrawn in the second half to "boost midfield" only for us to concede.

 

A stale second half (we googled a list of UK cities to see which ones we had visited during the "action") came to life in the last ten minutes when Westfield got their equaliser and then smelled blood.  The first goal was a close range shot from a low cross and the second a powerful strike from a breakaway move down their left.

 

A disappointing loss could have become a disappointing draw when we thought we had a good shout for a penalty.  Marco controlled a lofted ball into the area and was clear on goal with only the 'keeper to beat.  The defender, closely behind, fell and took Marco down without playing the ball but the referee waved it away.  Referees don't give those in the opening or closing two minutes being the unwritten law of the game.

 

So onto Saturday when the NEW GROUND KLAXON sounds again for the trip to Rayners Lane…

Tanners 1 - 2 Westfield

The Westfield curse hits again, as we lose and cement ourselves in a midtable position.

 

This was not a pretty game to watch.  Westfield came with a well-executed game plan and managed to slow the game down when needed; twice a substitution was called without the player coming on being ready.

 

The first half started off slow but for the last ten minutes we were very much on top.  If Leatherhead's strikers rocked up at a coconut shy, they would clear up as three good chances were shot straight at the 'keeper.  Then we got our goal.  For the second game, Ruben turned provider by chasing a ball and feeding in Lukas who found the back of the net.  For the second time, Ruben was withdrawn in the second half to "boost midfield" only for us to concede.

 

A stale second half (we googled a list of UK cities to see which ones we had visited during the "action") came to life in the last ten minutes when Westfield got their equaliser and then smelled blood.  The first goal was a close range shot from a low cross and the second a powerful strike from a breakaway move down their left.

 

A disappointing loss could have become a disappointing draw when we thought we had a good shout for a penalty.  Marco controlled a lofted ball into the area and was clear on goal with only the 'keeper to beat.  The defender, closely behind, fell and took Marco down without playing the ball but the referee waved it away.  Referees don't give those in the opening or closing two minutes being the unwritten law of the game.

 

So onto Saturday when the NEW GROUND KLAXON sounds again for the trip to Rayners Lane…

Tuesday, February 04, 2025

Westfield are coming!

Tonight sees the visit of Westfield to the Grove, for this league fixture.

Our guests sit just one place below us, but a win for them won't them above us… but we could go up one place with a win…

Kick off at 7.45. See you there!

Sunday, February 02, 2025

Horndean 1 - 1 Tanners

Leatherhead struggled with the conditions and went away with a disappointing - given the league positions – draw yesterday.

 

On arrival to the new ground, we quickly saw that this was going to be hard work.  You couldn't stand behind one goal, the pitch looked heavy and on a slope that Eddie The Eagle Edwards would have had second thoughts to take on.

 

Predictably, the first half produced little from either side.  In the second half, we kicked down hill and started to look a little livelier.  Especially when Lukas came on.

 

Ruben had put himself about a bit and it was from him we got our opening goal.  He chased down a ball on our left and slid it across to Lukas to tap in.  1-0.

 

At this point, Horndean donned their crampons and started to climb the north face of the pitch and started to mount some pressure.  The warning signs were there when they scored a perfrectly good goal, but it was ruled out for offside.  Not long after, Sonny failed to keep hold of a long shot and the ball spilled out to set up a tap in.

 

We did rally, but ultimately a draw was a fair result.  Onto Tuesday then and the visit of Westfield.

Saturday, February 01, 2025

Travelling Tanners

We travel towards the south coast with the NEW GROUND KLAXON ringing in our ears, as I cannot find a previous encounter between the clubs.

Looking at the league, only one team has played less games than us, and that is Horndean. Today we take on their fresh legs in the league to look to keep pressure on the play-off places.

Kick off at 3pm. Directions can be found here. See you there!

Tuesday, January 28, 2025

Game off

Predictably, tonight's game has fallen to the weather for the third time.

Hopefully Horndean will allow the NEW GROUND KLAXON to sound at the weekend.

Monday, January 27, 2025

Tanners 3 - 2 Met Police

A late goal gives Leatherhead all three points for the second consecutive game, but this time they were well worth the win and had to overcome some dubious officiating…

 

On the 50 Year anniversary of the Leicester City match, Before the game, a genuinely heartwarming moment occurred when a Leicester fan met the players, reminiscing about one of her all-time favourite games. Her grandson was even bought a (blue) Leatherhead shirt.

 

Onto the game and Leatherhead looked comfortable from the start.  The Met Police 'keeper did not look the most mobile of shot stoppers, so the instruction must have gone out to test him from distance.  So when Ruben lined up a shot from distance, he stood no chance and even the most agile goalkeepers would have struggled to save it.

 

About 10 minutes later the officials stepped in to make it interesting.  Met Police made a rare breakaway attack; the lino failed to see the striker in a clear offside position which would have stopped the move there and then but now our defender had to stop the move.  It wasn't quite clear if our defender was fouled, or the striker missed the ball and kicked our defender but after a brief pause the penalty was given.  1-1.

 

Second half and Leatherhead continued to apply themselves well.  After a few missed chances the lively Brisset found himself with a clear shot on goal after the defence parted in front of him.  Straight at the 'keeper but with enough power it went between his legs, albeit with a deflection, and into the goal.  2-1.

 

Another aspect of today's celebration was to show the Leicester game highlights on loop, and therefore I had already seen Leatherhead lose five times so I was desensitised to the award of another penalty.  Our defender rose with his back to the ball only to have the header strike his raised arm from close range.  2-2.

 

It looked like a disappointing draw was on the cards, but Dubai-bound Kavanagh had other ideas.  He sent in a deep cross to the far post that eluded everyone and found its way into the back of the net.  There is a chance a Leatherhead player got some form of contact to help it on its way, but no one was taking they goal from the departing captain.

 

A nice win to try and keep pressure on the play-off places.  We are supposed to be playing Guernsey on Tuesday but Sunday's rain and the arrival of Storm Herminia will no doubt put pay to that…

Saturday, January 25, 2025

Met Police are coming…

I'm assuming Thursday night's heavy rain isn't causing a problem today as there is no news of a pitch inspection.

Met Police come to the Grove for this league fixture. A side that sit just above the relegation zone and have lost their last four games… banana skin…

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Thursday, January 23, 2025

Tanners 2 - 1 Horndean

It felt like Leatherhead got away with one on Tuesday and must have sent a Horndean side travelling down the A3 wondering where it all went wrong.

 

Leatherhead looked reasonably comfortable in the first half.  The odd chance here and there but nothing to really write home about.  The highlights being a cross that was just beyond Lukas and hitting the post from a freekick.

 

Second half and I really did worry for us.  A little bit against the run of play, Horndean managed to get a close range shot in off of the post.  From then Leatherhead disappeared for a while.  Our guests had the chance to make it 2-0 with a striker clear through on goal, but luckily he pulled his shot just wide of the post.

 

Then our saviour stepped up.  Ruben had only been on for seven minutes before their opening goal but started to offer something different.  Notably, someone in the box to receive a cross.  Something we had lacked at Ks and most of this game.  

 

On 77 minutes Lukas fired in a cross from the right and there was Ruben to tap into the open net.  Then just when we thought we were settling for the draw the pair repeated the trick and grabbed the winner.

 

Three points to keep us moving up the table and we get to do it again (Storm Éowyn pending) on Saturday with the visit of Met Police.

Tuesday, January 21, 2025

Horndean are coming!

Can't talk. Eating curry.

Kick off at 7.45. See you there!

Monday, January 20, 2025

Ks 1 - 1 Tanners

After a string of cancellations and tricky games against lower-half teams, we could now look forward to an easier game against second-place-give-it-a-go Ks… and had we taken some of our first half chances that is how it would have seemed.

 

The nonsensical pitch inspection resulted in someone popping to Wickes and placing a bucket of sand down near a penalty spot.  Other than that the pitch facilitated free flowing football where Leatherhead could have marched onto a 3 to 4 goal lead.  We looked dangerous down our left but no one seemed to want to run on enough to finish the shot / cross that followed.

 

Their 'keeper, under some pressure, flapped at a ball and watched helplessly as it fell towards (some say over) the line until a desperate clearance saved his blushed.  Another powerful shot from the left took a slight deflection that was enough to take it onto the post and out for a corner.

 

Quite the start but the game looked to have settled down, and so with seconds to go I retreated to the bar to warm up only to discover Ks scored on the break.

 

The second half saw a more measured approach from Leatherhead but we still looked dangerous.  Finally we got the equaliser, when a cross found Lukas on the edge of the box and he fired a low shot through a crowded area and into the bottom corner.

 

I thought we would push on and win but the final 5-10 minutes belonged to Ks who kept us under real pressure and probably went away disappointed with just a draw.

 

Onto Tuesday then and the visit of sixteenth placed Horndean…

Saturday, January 18, 2025

Travelling Tanners

The pitch passed the most dubiously-called inspection of all time so we're off to Raynes Park Vale to play Ks.

My journey is not the best. The A3 is closed and the train has the glorious addition of a Rail Replacement Service. Joined up thinking, lads.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Tuesday, January 14, 2025

Travelling Tanners



After several postponements to our schedule, Leatherhead should return to action tonight for the Surrey Senior Cup.

 

For many, this the New Ground Klaxon will be sounding tonight.  I visited our Combined Counties opposition some ten years ago.  Our guests sit just outside the play-off places and recently beat our old friends Chipstead 4-1 away.

 

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Wednesday, January 01, 2025

Westfield are coming

This time last year we suffered a 3-0 loss away at Westfield, during a soaking wet late kick off. Hopefully the rain is the only constant today.

Our guests are on exactly the same number of points, albeit with a negative goal difference.

Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas!