Southall 1 - 0 Tanners

Leatherhead travelled to Southall (well Stanwell) and left with very little chance of a play off place. After Marlow away we were starting to think it might be possible, but after two pointless league games we look to have run out of aviation fuel.

We started quite brightly utilising Hayden's Plan A "Pass The Ball".  The 'keeper dealt well with three shots on target and we looked the most likely to score. As the half wore on we started to create less, and the main interest was whether the huge gas holders behind the goal actually contained kerosene. John Loveridge was adamant that they did.

When the second half started we were expecting Hayden's Plan B "Pass the Ball Better" but it soon became clear that the players had other ideas and adopted Plan C "Give The Ball Away".  On 48 minutes Southall took the lead and never looked like losing it as we tired and started to look very ragged.

It was decided that Hayden should be spared a post match interview and having to give any messages to the downbeat Tanners fans amongst a meagre crowd of 108. Maybe The Southern Combination and Surrey Senior Cups can still provide some light and joy on an otherwise frustrating and fragmented season.

Travelling Tanners

Southall, those romantic devils, have ensured our midweek fixture did not clash with Valentine's Day so that we had time to impress our partners with a 99p card and a bunch of supermarket-bought flowers.  "You didn't buy the cheapest bunch" was my reward and now I can focus on tonight's game.

Our hosts sit four places above us and are two points the good.  We first met in September where we played out a 0-0 draw at a time where we couldn't score at home in the league.

Southall ground share with Ashford (so no new ground) and directions can be found here.  Kick off at 7.45.  Good luck fellas!

Tanners 1 - 3 Chertsey

In recent weeks, Leatherhead have looked much improved and worthy of our play-off aspirations.  Chersey have looked the part all season though, so today was going to be a tough test.

Leatherhead nearly got off to the perfect start, with a good chance falling to Hector but the 'keeper saved well.  The opportunity remained when the ball rebounded out to Tarpey on the edge of the box, but his lofted effort went just wide.

Chersey responded with a good chance that they, lucky, blasted high and wide.  From then on the first half took on a more cautious tone and both sides dug in.  The large crowd became rather flat and it was played out to an inevitable 0-0.

Second half and Chersey stepped through the gears and had the home side largely at their mercy.  While the sight of Swannell lifted the spirits of kids around the age of 8, it did little for the supporters aged 40-50 something which is largely our demographic.

First, a lofted ball was headed home past our stranded 'keeper.  0-1. Then a low ball found a player on the spot who rifled it into the top left hand corner.  The third goal I missed while heading to the toilets.

We did try and restore some pride with a Dave Tarpey goal.  About 10 seconds of head-tennis was finished off by our striker, who needed to generate all the power himself to beat the 'keeper.

A real shame, as a win would have moved us up to eighth.  Southall, on Wednesday, is the next opportunity to progress up the league... 

Tanners 3 - 0 Frimley Green

When I think of Frimley Green I think of the BDO Darts; sitting in a hall wearing an Hawaiian shirt... although it was hardly the weather for that fancy dress as the temperature dropped lower than my feet could withstand.

Hayden, understandably, made a number of changes.  He played all the right players but not necessarily in the right order, with a centre back wearing the number 9 shirt.  He did open the scoring when the 'keeper palmed it down for a tap in but missed an open goal minutes later.

The goal certainly settled the nerves as Frimley Green missed an open goal and a one on one chance to perhaps go 2-0 up.

From there on Leatherhead controlled the game, winning a penalty late in the second half - which Archie calmly slotted away - and then securing a third goal which I missed due to frostbite.

A fine win but, even during the game, thoughts turn to Saturday and the arrival of Chertsey...

Frimley Green are coming!

Tonight we dip our toe into the Southern Combination Cup pool.  A competition originally set aside for the U23s but now falls upon the first team to fulfill the fixture due to their folding in the summer.

Kick off at 7.45.  Discounted prices for season ticket holders, by the way.  See you there!

Hanworth Villa 0 - 0 Tanners

Perhaps with one eye on the Southern Combination Cup, Leatherhead played out a 0-0 draw last night.

A blistering first half did not produce a goal and in the second half our hosts made it difficult for us on an increasingly frosty pitch.

On to Thursday then and the visit of Frimley Green.

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead hits the cold and frosty road tonight as they travel to Hanworth Villa.  A run of form takes us into a busy week as we look to climb up the table.  Our hosts sit just one place below us and recently beat South Park...

Lick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Marlow 1 - 3 Tanners

For only the second time this season, Leatherhead score three (or more) goals to notch up a fine win on the road.

Lawson was the man to get us on our way with two goals, the first as early as five minutes, with Marlow scoring in between.

Leatherhead had to dig deep in the second half, as Marlow responded, but a third goal from Diallo made the three points safe.

A busy week ahead this week, with a trip Hanworth Villa being first on the cards on Tuesday night...

Travelling Tanners

Whatever your troubles are, navigating the Marlow roundabout will soon put them into perspective.  We travel to Marlow FC today, in the league, following a string of good results.  A win could finally see us jump up the table after weeks of making ground.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Tanners 1 - 1 Chertsey (8-7 on penalties)

This game looked like it was going to penalties from the opening few minutes, the only surprise being there were two goals scored within the 90 minutes.

It wasn't a classic.  Leatherhead squandered a couple of chances when they had 1-1s, one by Archie and someone who looks exactly like Archie.

In the second half Chersey mounted an attack with their striker in possession inside the box.  He still had plenty to do but managed to hold off one our defenders and release a powerful shot into the back of the net.  0-1.

It felt like this had happened in the 120th minute but a quick glance at the scoreboard showed it was only 67 minutes.  Plenty of time...

Chertsey had won everything in the air.  In fact the only corner that was not met by a Chertsey head was when it was kicked straight out for a goal kick.  So when, on 85 minutes, a corner was predictably cleared we thought another chance had gone but it fell to Dan Hector; who shifted the ball to his right and rifled a shot into the top right hand corner.

Suddenly the game sprang to life.  Leatherhead mounted another quick attack but this broke down to send the visitors up the other end where they very nearly scored but for an amazing save from Slav.  Penalties then...

The ref really should have gone straight to penalties as this was the best part of the game by far.  Both teams made their first three before Tarpey stepped up and hit the bar.  The pressure of the fifth penalty was too much for Chertsey's fifth penalty taker and he also hit the bar.

Parity remained until the eighth penalty where Slav stepped up.  We have been here before when Zak took one... same song, same result as it sailed over the bar.  Then their cocky 'keeper stepped up and out of some weird goal-keeper-union sympathy he sent the ball the same way.

It was getting tense now and I looked down to make an update and I was inexplicably about to tweet a picture of the San Siro... foreign objects struck my leg... basically I lost count.

I knew enough that if Slav saved after we scored we would win.  He had already got his hands on two but not managed to keep it out but finally he got enough on (the tenth as it turns out) one to send us into the next round.

Smashing.  Onto Marlow! 

Chertsey are coming

There-or-there-abouts Chertsey come to the Grove tonight for the Surrey Senior Cup.  They ran out comfortable winners when we played them away in October, but the team has gone under a transformation since then.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Tanners 2 - 0 Northwood

After two months, I have decided to rekindle my love for The Lip... and what a time to do it with a fine 2-0 win over second place Northwood.

Our visit to Northwood was a disaster as we failed to deal with some of their taller players.  It appears these have been snaffled up by other teams, so it was a very different side that visited us today.  That being said, they are in second place for a reason and quite capable of ruining another afternoon for me.

That was not the case as we played attacking football from the start and limited the visitors to scraps.  

Our opening goal came just before the half hour.  We had wasted a few chances but finally a low cross was met by a player and slid it into the back of the net.  Omarr Lawson being the player to pounce.

We stopped outside the away dressing room in the hope of hearing a full-throttle expletive-ridden teamtalk but it appeared the manager just gave his team the silent treatment and nothing could be heard.

Second half and Leatherhead did not let up the pressure.  Leatherhead being Leatherhead meant that a second goal would be needed to calm the nerves.  

It came from a Keane Anderson header, doing well to adjust his body while picking himself up off the floor having just missed an attempt seconds earlier.

The referee then put the result when he sent off the Northwood left back for bringing down one of our players as we attacked on the break.  The referee decided that as there was no covering defender within the original boundaries of space or time, he was the last man and had to go.

A fine win but Leatherhead find themselves stuck in the bottom half but are at least building some momentum to take us into the Surrey Senior Cup on Tuesday...

Tanners 1 - 1 Tooting & Mitcham

A hard fought draw against a side that, judging by the amount of cramp they suffer from, are in desperate need of salt tablets.

Now, I missed the first half on account of turning on the Christmas Lights in the Swan Centre but I understand a nasty foul saw the visitors go down to ten men.

This brought on the worst case of time wasting I have ever seen as players went down with cramp and injury every five minutes.  They mustered enough strength to fire away a long range effort that beat our new 'keeper and went 1-0 up.

Leatherhead threw everything at them and their goal led a charmed life as goal bound headers struck the backs of unaware defenders.  It didn't seem to be our day.

Then a moment of magic when a loft ball to the top of the box was cushioned into the path of Tarpey who cooly finished to make it 1-1.   Limbs.

A game we could have easily lost resulted in a point.  Not enough to put send us up the table but keeps us away from danger.

Surrey Senior Cup action on Tuesday with a trip to Horley...

Tooting & Mitcham are coming

Old rivalries are rekindled today with the visit of Tooting & Mitcham.

Our guests find themselves in the relegation zone but while we look to be breaking free, inconsistency is our biggest problem.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Binfield 2 - 1 Tanners

Leatherhead will feel as sick as a Welshman, as a last minute goal denies them a well earned draw.

Binfield took the lead with an early goal before Maxwell Mullins glanced a header from a free kick past the 'keeper to make it 1-1 on 23 minutes.

1-1 it stayed until stoppage time and it all fell apart.  Two Leatherhead players were shown red cards for two separate incidents.  Then from the free kick from the second red, the ref saw something in the box and pointed to the spot.

Our new 'keeper was sent the wrong way in it went to make it 2-1.

A chance to bounce back comes next Saturday, with the visit of Tooting & Mitcham...

Travelling Tanners

Today Leatherhead travel to Binfield, a ground that saw both a late arrival of Jerry and Bradbrook goal in the FA Cup in 2013.

Now we travel there for a league game as we hope to start climbing the table…

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 2-1 Ks

Leatherherhead triumphed over Ks in the League Cup with an impressive performance where a 3-1 scoreline would not have flattered.

The first half showed promise and we got the kind of goal all recipient supporters love to see.  Ks' No 4 sent the ball towards the goal with the expectation their 'keeper would be there to clear it but sadly for him he wasn't.  The ball rolled in slow motion towards the goal with the ageing shot stopper not able to scramble back in time.

Ks were through one on one with our new 'keeper but the striker made his effort rather obvious to read and the shot was well saved.

The second half proved to be even more entertaining with Leatherhead cutting through the Ks defence at will.  That's not to say we had it all our own way, when a Ks striker released a well placed shot from the edge of the box to equalise.

Our deserved winner came from a swift move through the middle which released a player just left of the goal.  The player opted to square it to Pearch, which seemed a strange thing to do initially but all was forgiven when he smashed it past a player on the line.

We could have had a couple more but for a lino who raised his flag too early and a Tarpey header that was sent wide.

Onto the next round and an away trip to Saturday's opponents Binfield (I believe)...

Ks are coming

Tonight we welcome our old friends, and one-time tenants, to Fetcham Grove for tonight's league cup game.

The league cup provides a good opportunity for the players to try out against higher opposition and for the visiting supporters to get back up close and personal with Hayden Bird.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 2 Marlow

Leatherhead failed to lay a glove on our visitors as yet again we lose to play-off-placed opposition.

It looked promising at first.  We were pressuring and, while they looked dangerous on the break, we looked the most likely to score.  Until 60 seconds of football that Dave Tarpey will want to forget.

His first contribution was to find himself in the way of a powerful goal-bound shot from Archie Burnett.  Perhaps he tried to get out of the way but it almost looked like he tried to control it.  

Perhaps frustrated at his unintentional intervention he went up the other end and tried to make amends with a desperate tackle but completely got it wrong and gave away a penalty.  The spot kick was put away comfortably to make it 0-1.

That kicked the stuffing out of Leatherhead and from then on we really did fail to compete.  In the second half the only Marlow player in the box was allowed to head the ball past Ringer to make it 2-0.

If the rain holds off perhaps we get to see Ks in the League Cup on Tuesday...

Marlow are coming

With the River Mole lapping on the edge of Fetcham Grove, it is fitting we host the Swan Derby and the visit of fifth-placed Marlow.

Since Hayden arrived, we have won the games that matter but given a good hiding from the there-or-thereabouts teams... BUT the game against Uxbridge showed or a different performance which will hopefully carry us into tomorrow.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead look to bounce back from Saturday's 3-1 defeat with a trip to Uxbridge.  For many, a new-ground klaxon may be sounding but I have been there as I seem to recall we played a pre-season friendly there in 2006... awaiting confirmation of this...

Uxbridge sit in 11th and recently beat Northwood 1-0, so they will certainly prove to be stiff opposition tomorrow.

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas. 

Northwood 3 - 1 Tanners

Despite a promising first half, Leatherhead leave Northwood nothing after being well and truly spanked by the league leaders.

With a setting sun I was blinded from behind the goal so made the mistake of assessing the hosts as being a small side... I somehow missed their 6' 6" striker and defender who would go on to make our lives quite difficult.

We started well, with Reise making some good runs and stretching their defence but as the game wore on our hosts got the measure of us and kept us at bay.

That said, the first half did not look like it was going to yield goals until a late corner was met by Northwood's smallest player who glanced his header into the back of the net.

Second half lacked any of the sustained pressure of the first half and Northwood dictated the game.  Two quick goals - a near post shot and a neat finish from a nice move through the middle - were well deserved and will give Hayden plenty to think about.

We did strike back with some pace from Jermaine, who crossed into Reise for a neat finish but the damage was done.

So my new Tanners shirt is now deemed unlucky and my only joy was updating my spreadsheet for a new ground...

Uxbridge on Tuesday anyone..? 

Travelling Tanners

NEW GROUND KLAXON as we travel to top-of-the-table Northwood in the league tomorrow.

Leatherhead have notched up two wins in the last two league games, so go there in good spirits.  Dave Tarpey has even found his scoring boots with three in two.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Tanners 2 - 1 Ashford Town

Leatherhead notch up their first win, thanks to a late Tarpey penalty.  It could have been more comprehensive but for the woodwork that saved the visitors three times.

Leatherhead played the first half with a new found confidence as they pushed the ball around  with real intent.  Archie bent a shot just past the post before we struck the woodwork twice.

Tarpey then found the back of the net with a powerful shot that moved left then right in the air, leaving the 'keeper diving helplessly as it flew in.

Just before half time a number of supporters went into the and commented just how much better the team looked. This was awkward on two accounts.  One, Luke Tuffs was in the same bar and two, Ashford swung in a freekick and equalised.

Second half Leatherhead looked less decisive and it appeared the game would finish a draw until Tarpey won a lte penalty and duly converted. The side celebrated like they had won the league... or certainly their first home league game.

Frimley come to the Grove on Tuesday...

Ashford Town (Middlesex) are coming

Tenth place Ashford hope to come to the Grove tomorrow as we face a tense wait for news of how the pitch has survived recent rain.

Leatherhead will hope to bounce back from  their disappointing, penalty inspired, defeat last week.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Travelling Tanners

Another tough trip for Hayden and his new-look team as we take on 4th placed Chertsey.

I'm in birthday mode, so will miss this one but I will be following from the safety of St Albans...

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Merstham 1 - 2 Tanners

Leatherhead win!  It certainly didn't feel like it would happen with a Merstham side happy to waste time and make like very difficult.  I have no idea who they are waiting to play at home before giving it a go but their lack of ambition cost them.

The first half was a complete waste of time but things came to life in second.  The signs were there when Tarpey missed a chance and Merstham cleared off the line.  Then Trey Williams was released down the right and his powerful and low shot found the bottom corner.  Wild celebrations followed.

Celebrations were short lived.  Merstham's plan of time wasting went out the window and they pressed for an equaliser.  In the chaos that followed we cleared as best we could but a Merstham player flung a boot at a ball some 25 metres out and in it flew.

Merstham soon sunk back to winding down the clock and a win looked hopeless until Dan Hector picked up the ball in the box, beat a few players and then unleashed a shot that flew in via the far post.

A much needed three points before we take on Chertsey next week...

Travelling Tanners

They all count, as we notched up our first win under Hayden in the week.  We certainly needed something to build on as tomorrow's trip to Merstham is massive.  A loss there could easily see us drop to the foot of the table.

Hopefully the rain won't prevent the game from taking place but keep your eyes open for updates.  Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

East Grinstead 1 - 1 Tanners

Somehow I got everything about this game wrong but everything turned out OK in the end.

Leatherhead's woes seemed to be getting worse when their bright start was rebuffed and the hosts scored.  The warning signs were there when a powerful shot nearly caught out Luke as it moved from right to left in the air.  Soon after another powerful shot was unleashed and Luke had no chance.

Leatherhead lost their way but got a much needed goal from a set piece.  From out wide a ball was sent to the far post and it dipped enough to beat the 'keeper and go in off of the post.

Second half saw chances to both sides, the best chance falling to East Grinstead in the last few minutes... but it went over and then straight to penalties.

We sent in our two big guns, Tarpey and Jermaine, but neither could find the net with East Grinstead scoring one from their opening two penalties.

Parity was preserved until, ex-Leatherhead legend, Steve Sargent stepped up to win it for East Grinstead.  His thoughts must have turned to THAT set piece and he instinctively fired the ball towards the corner flag.

With Levred making their next penalty, suddenly the pressure was on the hosts and after a couple of rounds it told and Luke saved.  This sets up a home tie with Ks who will be delighted to see Hayden again...

Travelling Tanners

For some this will be a NEW GROUND KLAXON as I don't recall us playing them before but for some reason I have visited our new friends.

Things looked good on Saturday until a 9 minute collapse saw the much needed points slip away.  Our hosts are higher up the table than Chipstead so we can expect a tough game.

If the trip is too far, Corinthian-Casuals use our ground again tonight... but otherwise directions can be found here.   Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Tanners 2 - 3 Chipstead

An unbeaten run in the league comes to an end, despite building a two goal lead.

I wasn't at the game but by all accounts we looked bright for half an hour, then we were under the cosh. Scored against the fun of play from a great Tarpey free kick, hit the bar and then scored a second from the new guy Reise. 

And then it all fell apart with a defence like swiss cheese. Only one of the new players (Reise) looked like he had settled in.

Plenty for Hayden to think about before the trip to East Grinstead on Tuesday…

Chipstead are coming!

A new Hayden era kicks off with a visit from Chipstead today.  We find ourselves at the wrong end of the table and looking for a goal at home, let alone a home win.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 0 - 0 Basingstoke

The first scandal of the day was Swannel, the club's new mascot, entered the field of play naked; forgetting to put his shirt on.  With so many children there, I'm sure he will be on some form of list before too long.

Leatherhead were hosting a side that recently travelled to Chertsey and beat them comfortably, so it was unsurprising Leatherhead didn't go all out looking for their first home leage goal.  

It nearly came though when Mitchel headed just wide and Day decided to try and get his head (normally seven feet off of the ground) to a low ball rather than kick it.

Second half and I was unsure if Basingstoke were playing for a draw or trying to win as timewasting was punctuated with genuine attempts on goal.  They thought they had scored when a ball hit the post and was snatched off the line by Luke.

Leatherhead did push for a winner but Basingstoke were just too solid and composed in defence.

No competitive game now for two weeks so there will be friendlies to look out for...

Basingstoke are coming!

I don't know if my memory is playing tricks on me but today we welcome a side that once had Bruce Grobbelaar play for them... 

Oh to be able to buy a goal today though, with Leatherhead failing to score in their last few games and have yet to ripple the net at home in the league.

By contrast, Basingstoke are doing very well for themselves and will be looking to put more space between themselves and the play-off-chasing pack.

Kick off at 3pm.  Could be a big crowd so get there early.  See you there!

RPV 2 - 0 Tanners

On a night which brought out the big coat from the cupboard, Leatherhead were beaten by Raynes Park Vale in another friendly.

The first half was largely uneventful.  Jermaine was fired up and wanted something from the game.  Our number 3 was certainly fired up when he disagreed with the ref over an award of a foul throw.

Second half and there was more intensity from Leatherhead but it failed to produce a much needed goal.  Shots were blasted straight at either the nearest defender or at the 'keeper.

The opening goal was scored by Leatherhead... into their own net.  The second was beautiful as it was simple.  A lofted ball over our right back was chased and delicate chipped into the side netting.

2-0 it ends and to top off the evening I was, rightly, told off for eating the players' post match food...

Onto Basingstoke on Saturday then...

Tanners 0 - 1 Farnham

Still no goals for Leatherhead in a friendly played in fine conditions and a competitive spirit.

I was quite impressed with the turn out for this game.  The fine  weather brought in  a reasonable crowd to watch what was,on the whole, an uneventful game.

Farnham were taking this perhaps a  little too seriously when two fouls in quick succession on the same player saw him limp off.

Their goal was very much true to Leatherhead's form.  A powerful shot thundered  off of the bar only to find a player on the edge of the box.  With our 'keeper on the floor having committed to saving the first shot it only took a well  placed shot to beat him and any defenders trying to close the danger down.  1-0.

On to  Raynes Park Vale on Tuesday for another friendly with, hopefully, goals from Leatherhead.

Farnham are coming

Farnham Town arrive at The Grove for a friendly today.  A day off, due to an early Trophy exit, means we have a Saturday to try and learn how to score goals again.

I'll be there to install a new feature at The Grove and the bar will be open.

Kick off at 1pm.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 0 Southall

A Southall side that appeared to come for a draw go home the happier side as a game that was described, politely, as attritional  was played out last night.

I thought it was going to be very different when Archie Burnett made a darting run in the box and went over... the ref blew his whistle and I thought we got a penalty for the worst dive I have ever seen but it was for offside.  That was largely the action for the first half  done and dusted with.

Second half was harder to watch until a sequence that brought about three chances over 10 seconds.   Tarpey hit the post and the ball rebounded to Mitch who struck it low at the 'keeper.  Back to Mitch who then blasted wide.  A golden 10 seconds.

Southall created little but did force the best save of the game with a low dive to stop a ball that looked destined to find the bottom corner.

No game this weekend but there are rumours of a friendly at The Grove...

Southall are coming

After gaining a point away at Guernsey, a game that local press suggest we should have taken all three, we face new friends in the shape of Southall.

Southall sit just outside the play-off places with 8 points.  A win tonight will put us just one point behind them,  albeit at this early stage of the season.

Kick off at 7.45pm.   See you there!

Guernsey 1 - 1 Tanners

Leatherhead weathered an early storm not to go into half time a couple of goals down.

If hitting the woodwork was a competition, we would be top of the league this year... but it isn't and we find ourselves near the bottom.

Therefore when Guernsey scored from a ball over the top those who made the trip must have feared the worst.  That was until Tarpey was brought down in the box and coolly slotted away the penalty.

A point on the road before we face Southall on Tuesday at home...

Travelling Tanners

After the disappointment of the FA Trophy, Leatherhead turn their attention back to the league and the trip to Guernsey.

The first time we played our hosts we lost our in form striker, due to new father duties, but still took a large travelling contingent.

This trip, the uncertainty over the date etc. will mean few will make the trip but all current strikers travel.

Kick off at 2pm.  Good luck fellas. 

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead face Walton & Hersham in the FA Sodding Trophy tonight in our third attempt to beat our hosts in the last 12 months.

Kick off at 7.45pm.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 1 - 2 Chichester

Leatherhead crash out of the cup after Chichester secured their first away win of the season.

Everything looked straight forward for much of the second half.  Our hosts didn't much on or off the pitch, so when we scored I felt the cup win was ours.  

We were a touch fortunate after the ball struck the hand of our player which allowed him to control and pass to Buchanan who smashed it home. The scorer went on to hit the post with a near header moments later.

The damage was done for Leatherhead two minutes either side of half time.  First it looked like Keane was fouled to allow the Chichester player to make enough space to shoot from distance.  

Then into the second half and they scored again.  Our 'keeper made an initial save but could not get to the 50:50 in time and the ball was slid under him.

Leatherhead looked lackluster and short of ideas but did somehow manage to hit the post another time.  McGlashan came on to increase the quality down our right and while the last 5 minutes saw us knock on the door, our shots were smothered.

Perhaps on another day the deflection that took our shot onto the bar goes in... but today it didn't and those that had flights to Guernsey booked can breathe a sigh of relief.

Onto next Saturday and the bloody waste of time that is the Trophy.

Chichester are coming

Chichester make their way up from the South East division, to play in this FA Cup First Qualifying Round game.

Our guests have only tasted defeat once this season,  losing just 1-0 to Lancing last week.  We, on the other hand, have not got off to the best start in the league BUT the FA Cup game was the stand out performance of the season so far.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 2 Walton & Hersham

It wasn't just a cutting edge missing today. It was the knife the bread and the butter.

Despite a more assured defensive display, Leatherhead were unable to find other players in green once they got into attacking positions and caused W&H very few problems. 

3 points from 4 games is about as welcome as a topless half time FaceTime call from the beach. 

A very disappointing start for a team fancied to be there or thereabouts at the end of the season.

If we play better in the FA Cup next week, questions will need to be asked about the effort being put into league games by players who should be getting better results. 

Walton & Hersham are coming

Bank Holiday football comes to The Grove today and this visit of ambitious local rivals, Walton & Hersham.

Our visitors knocked us out the Surrey Senior Cup last year and are tipped to be there or thereabouts this season in the league. Expect a big crowd…

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas! 

Thatcham Town 1 - 2 Tanners

Leatherhead made hard work of this one with the first half looking the most sluggish.   We controlled the game but seemed to lack a real cutting edge.

The opening goal was spectacular though.  Buchanan chased a ball to the left of goal and opted to loft the ball into the path of the on-coming Webb.  His first time volley found the bottom corner and sent the large travelling contingent into wild celebrations.

Leatherhead appeared to take the stuffing out of our hosts in the second half and really looked more likely to score.  Tarpey could have had a hatful had the ball not repeatedly got stuck under his feet or hit a bobble.

Tarpey and Buchanan are starting to understand each other though and Tarpey turned provider as his cross found Buchanan's thigh.  They all count.

Despite the dominance we somehow managed to allow Thatcham to score and set up a nervous finish.  A freekick on the edge of the box being just one nervy moment, but their 'keeper predicted it would end up in the Kennet and that's exactly what happened.

Three points and a visit of Walton & Hersham on Monday...

Travelling Tanners

The New Ground Klaxon sounds as we are off to Thatcham Town tomorrow.  By chance I have a party in Reading tonight  so this fixture worked out nicely.

Thatcham are unbeaten with two draws.  Leatherhead have been very much beaten in the league but put in a good display in the FA Cup.

Directions can be found here.  Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Tanners 3 - 0 Haywards Heath

Leatherhead looked a completely different side yesterday as they took the game to our guests and largely dominated.  The cup being the cup meant that, despite controlling the game, we couldn't really relax until the chances were capitalised on.

The first goal came via a freekick, swung in from the left then headed back across goal to the feet of Tarpey.  He landed awkwardly for him and it took him a couple of attaempts to prod it into the roof of the net.  Limbs.

Tarpey almost turned provided when he slide it into Elliot but he either mistruck it or tried to be too clever as it clipped the post and went out for a goal kick.

Second half and we needed a second goal.  Elliot broke down the right (looked offside I have to admit) and slid it into Tarpey.  We learned two things with the resulting shot; Dave Tarpey knows where the back of the net is and he knows where the camera is also as he ran to celebrate infront of the sizable lens.  Total limbs.

More pressure saw Leatherhead denied a clear penalty and Gough go narrowly wide from a low freekick.  Haywards Heath then threw on Melford Simpson, who created some havoc and saw his team carve out two chances that, had they gone in, would have shattered the dream... but one was well saved and another blasted over.

Two nil was more than comfortable until McGlashan chased a ball and got a little lucky with how the ball rebounded out infront of him from a tackle.    There was nothing lucky about his deft finish which delecately glided over the diving 'keeper.  Absolute limbs.

So now we have the draw to look forward to on Monday and the distant sound of the New Ground Klaxon as we travel to Thatcham on Saturday.

Haywards Heath are coming!

The FA Cup returns to The Grove tomorrow, with the visit of Haywards Heath.

Our guests are one of the favourites to do well in their league (same level) this season but have had a disappointing start by their standards, with just a draw to their name… a draw more than us though…

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 1 South Park

Erik ten Hag and Luke shared a glass of wine together and reflected on a difficult start to the season on Tuesday night.  A slender 1-0 defeat showed signs of improvement but still not enough to get something from the game.

I arrived at The Grove in my new Matt Bently top both shocked at how small it was and dizzy from having to breathe in so much.

Onto the game and Leatherhead looked a lot brighter.  The static side that got pumped 4-0 on Saturday were now willing to run and challenge our visitors a bit.  We looked most dangerous when playing it along the ground but still opted for some wasteful long balls that caused moans from the crowd.

South Park's goal was something of a surprise.  A long range shot went through a crowded area and neatly struck the post and snuck in.  The silence was deafening.

Football being the cruel mistress that it is, saw Gough's long range shot strike the post but sneak out.  The half ended 0-1.

Second half and I treated myself to one of our new pie range.  A pie that was rich in flavour and reasonably priced but did little for my enjoyment of wearing my new top.

Leatherhead dominated much of the second half but South Park managed to block everything that we threw at them. Elliot came on to add some height and strength upfront but it did not change our luck.

Onto the FA Cup on Saturday then...

South Park are coming

Both sides go into this game on the back of a 4-0 loss on the opening day of the season, looking to make amends.

Leatherhead, by all accounts, have made a couple of changes to gear up for tonight.  A night that will no doubt be a lot cooler than the conditions of Saturday.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 4 Westfield

Luke said he thought we needed a few games to get going, I didn't believe him thinking Tarpey alone would be enough but he was right.

Tarpey looked to get the season off to the perfect start when he pounced on a ball and prodded it beyond the reach of the 'keeper.  His guilty glance to the lino caused the flag to be raised but amatuer-VAR showed he was onside.

Westfield then decided to take the game to Leatherhead and we failed to respond.  They got the opening goal, scored by Bradley Walsh.  This caused some amusement for the home supporters... but the good humour was short-lived as the game went from bad to worse when they made it 2-0... then (onto the second half now) 3 and then 4...

Meanwhile, Leatherhead looked hot and tired and failed to register much more than one or two shots on target.

Leatherhead tick off another point of the compass on Tuesday with the visit of South Park... a side who also lost 4-0 today...

 

Westfield are coming!

Our new friends from Woking arrive at the Grove today as we get the season underway.  Some mixed results in friendlies BUT with some outstanding performances means we have shot to the top of the "fans' pick" for the title this season.  No pressure then.

Kick off at 3pm. See you there!

Burgess Hill are coming

Get your sun cream on, Burgess Hill are coming for the last pre-season of the season.

Hopefully all our players will come through unscathed as we look to be ready for this exciting season…

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Tanners 3 - 0 Epsom & Ewell

Leatherhead notch up their second trophy of the pre-season with a comfortable 3-0 over our tenants.

While we are the higher ranked side, it was Epsom & Ewell who forced the first save.  A looping shot that seemed destined to lob our 'keeper but he did enough to tip it over.

From there on though it was largely Leatherhead who controlled the game.  At the centre of it is the player who is looking like the real deal as we approach the start of the season; Dave Tarpey.

On 9 minutes the ball fell to him roughly on the penalty spot and he clinically finished to set us on our way.  Little else happened in the first half but in the second there was more drama and tragedy.

Into the second half and Max went down hard under a challenge and had to be stretchered off.  We still await the results but it sounds serious...

That didn't phase Tarpey though who chased a ball, jinked around the 'keeper and calmly placed it into the back of the net.  Not long after he flicked a ball into the path of our No 3 (still no names, sorry!) who calmly finished low into the far corner.

Epsom & Ewell had already lost their 'keeper by the time the third went in and then the outfield player in gloves found himself facing a Tarpey penalty.  Word must have got around that I was now paying £10 a goal and he took pity on me by calmly planting it directly on the post.  Top lad.

No sooner had the penalty been missed the referee blew his whistles and the voice of Freddie Mercury hung in the air as we were now champions of another trophy... 

Back to ordinary friendlies on Saturday with the visit of Burgess Hill...

Ks are coming!

After the drama of last Saturday, we turn our attention to the visit of local rivals and ex-tenants; Kingstonian.

I won't be at the game, as I'm off to Leicester, but will looking out for the score and bar sales from afar.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas! 

Travelling Tanners

A rather long trip for a pre-season friendly tonight with a trip to Hungerford Town.  This is a club I have wanted to tick off for a while but visitors from Brazil mean this trip will have to wait...

The Leatherhead & Dorking Advertiser Trophy winners will no doubt need some shuffling after the effort of the weekend but go in good spirits.

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 3 - 2 Dorking Wanderers

Since the competition's rebirth it has been very much one way traffic, with Leatherhead only scoring one goal in the previous three meetings... but that was all about to change.

Change did not seem on the cards after 20 minutes when they notched up a 2-0 after having a goal ruled out for offside but when new-boy Tarpey met a lofted cross and guided it in off the far post the comeback was on.

The equalising goal I missed.  With a long queue in the bar and a freshly stocked "fanzone" bar full of various beer bottles, I relived my bar-working Uni days and plugged away there for half an hour.

I did make it out in time to see Leatherhead maintain some possession and then flick a ball through the middle to set up the winner.  Limbs.

Dorking decided to try and get something from the game but Leatherhead mastered the art of defending and held on to become the only team in Surrey.

The long trip to Hungerford is in store on Tuesday for the next friendly...

Dorking Wanderers are coming!

After a summer break The Lip is back in action along with the Tanners back at the Grove, hosting Dorking Wanderers.

Last season was not pretty to watch.  A jewel-encrusted Marc White led his team to a comfortable win against a side that lacked any kind of depth.  This year, Luke and Jermaine have built something more stable BUT still face the same problem of facing a side where the gap in leagues has now grown by two.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Tanners 2 - 0 Potters Bar

Not the Great Escape we talked about in the bar while drinking half price beer before the game.  Leatherhead  did everything they could in this division but a result in Hertfordshire proved decisive.

With three games of importance happening elsewhere it was difficult to focus on the game being played out in front of you but an early award of a penalty helped focus the mind.  

Mitchall Gough stepped up to take it, in place of the suspended Paget, but it was saved.  Max Worsfold was alive to the situation and placed the rebound into the bottom right corner.  It is amazing how easy it is to follow up a penalty without a defender encroaching by about 5 yards.

Leatherhead went on to dominate the first half, carving out a couple of great chances and even striking the bar, in a half of football that usually results in disappointment in the second half... but not today.

As the second half started news was filtering that results were favourable in our league it was just Kings Langley that were proving to the game too far, still holding onto their early 1-0 against Salisbury. 

Hopes of us retaining the vital win were boosted when we scored from a corner.  The Potters Bar 'keeper got a little over excited and attempted to save a shot that was going wide; taking the ball over the line for a corner.  In the ball came and Cameron Black, with the extra spring in the step that comes with being voted The Lip's Player of the Season, rose to head it home.

Time wore on and suddenly a cry of "phenytoin Salisbury" went up and hung there in the air, suspended by the hopes of 500 Leatherhead fans who believed it was really our day.  

If the Salisbury player had put the ball the other way perhaps it would have been but the penalty was saved and the 10 men of Kings Langley bravely went on to double their lead and win 2-0.

So it ended with us going down on goal difference.  Thoughts of last minute goals (as early as the second game of the season against Wingate & Finchley) and atrocious decisions were soon put to one side to clap the team off, pack the bar for the end of season awards and start to look forward to next season...

Potters Bar

This is it then, the whole shooting match comes down to a need for one win and three losses / draws.

As if today wasn't big enough we welcome the perfect pantomime villain to the Grove.  Sammy Moore arrives, starting his fourth five year plan in four years. That said he has pulled our hosts clear of trouble and will no doubt put up stiff opposition today.

Come and see the Treasurer fight people from entering the bar until 2.01.  See you there!

Ks 2 - 2 Tanners

A game that had everything, except for a competent official, ended 2-2 in dramatic fashion to keep us in the hunt for survival.

Leatherhead approached this game very differently to the game against Folkestone, with a high press and attacking confidence.  Jermaine was unplayable with other midfielders joining in to create pressure in their back line.

It was somewhat unfortunate then that their opening goal came from such a press.  For a second it looked like we could force a mistake but one pass found a midfielder that fed it out to their impressive No8 who in turn found a cross for a powerful header.

Leatherhead responded quickly by earning a penalty when Jermain was brought down in the box.  Up stepped Paget; scorer of emphatic penalties in recent games; who struck it too close to the 'keeper and it was saved... but not completely dead.

Paget responded quickly and headed the rebound towards goal.  It looked like it was cleared off of the line by some great defending but the replay shows he had encroached by about 5 yards and the referee (who only has one job during a penalty kick) missed it.  Thanks.

Leatherhead did not lie down and soon got level when Lamont stormed through the middle and placed a low and powerful shot into the bottom left corner.  Wild celebrations followed.

Second half and the referee was at it again.  Jermaine was in receipt of a ball from midfield but rather than controlling it in front of the defender he opted to spin and let the ball bounce over their heads.  The defender was beaten and Jermaine was through on goal so opted to put both arms around him and bring him down.  

Paget saw a second yellow for this on Saturday but the ref opted to wave a dismissive finger and allow play to go on... and play on it did as Ks notched up their second goal from their second chance of the game.  Again, thanks.

The ref wasn't done there.  As the game became more tense it began to affect some of the players.  No doubt some pleasantries between two players resulted in a headbutt from a Ks player.  The off-the-ball incident was seen by the ref and play stopped, assistant consulted and only a yellow card awarded.  No please referee, the pleasure is all mine.

With Kings Langley winning (a team I hadn't heard of until recently) a loss was looking like the end of the road but then the footballing gods took pity on us.  Leatherhead pressed for the equaliser and with just two minutes of injury time to go a powerful cross caught the shin of a Ks defender and flew in via the near post.

Not the win we truly wanted but with kind results we may just survive yet.  Mathematical geniuses have modelled the best result for us tonight... all we know is that we have to win on Saturday...

Travelling Tanners

Never before, in the history or relegation battles, has so much been asked of so few… Leatherhead travel to Ks today in this crucial game.

Last away game of the season, so make the short trip and support the Tanners.

Kick off at 3pm.   You know the way by now.  See you there!

Tanners 0 - 1 Folkestone Invicta

This fixture always sat awkwardly in our run-in as being one that posed the most problems and so it turned out.

Folkestone arrived having scored 80 goals this season, the exact same as we had conceded, so we set out to frustrate.  This largely worked a treat as we limited them to long range potshots for much of the game.

We offered little by way of attack. There was genuine excitement when Jermaine received the ball but often it was pumped to Eshun who had the tough job of trying to build anything when martialled by such an organised defence.  He got clobbered several times with Olivia needing to run on and water him like a freshly potted plant.

A credible draw looked likely until the moment that changed the game.  Paget skillfully martialed a long ball out from Folkestone (after one of our attacks broke down) and let it bounce over his head.  99 times out of 100 the ball wouldn't be allowed to bounce again but alas this time it did.  

The moment's lapse allowed the Folkestone player to get the beating of Paget and he brought him down as he tried to recover the situation.  A second yellow was shown and off he went.

The resulting freekick looked wild but took a kind deflection and found the back of the net.  0-1.

He tried to rally and while we forced a corner, nothing really came of it.  Ks on Monday it is then...

Folkestone Invicta are coming

Folkestone arrive to the Grove, like us, just one point from their objective.  Of the last three games we have this is by the toughest.

A last minute goal last week keeps us in the chase but we'll need two wins somewhere… let's hope one is today…

Kick off at 3pm. See you there.

Wingate & Finchley 1 - 1 Tanners

It remains to be seen if this was a must win but it felt like it was. 

The first half was dull with very few chances created. The most excitement was created when Chloe noticed that Luke was absent from the bench. 

Supporters were despatched to various parts of the ground to try and find him. He was finally spotted up with the pigeons in the rafters of the main stand. The spotting of Luke certainly calmed nerves but there was there little else to coo about in the first half. 

It seemed that Wingate were falling right into our trap of creating very little and looking very average. They made the mistake of scoring which, as usual, turned us into a completely different side. It was like we had just brought on Salah, Mane, and Firmino to replace the Southampton forward players (whoever they may be).

The Wingate keeper who had spent most of the game smirking, shouting "BALDY" at a  mild mannered green grocer, and muttering "you're going down" suddenly had work to do. 

Jermaine left it far too late to bring himself on but his appearance on 80 minutes changed the game. A goal on 90 minutes followed the first real period of pressure on the Wingate goal and it could have been all 3 points in the dying seconds but it wasn't to be this time.

The Wingate keeper waived a cheery fare thee well and safe travels to the Leatherhead supporters. He knew that the chances of seeing us again next season has been sadly diminished.

All is not yet lost so don't book your holidays in Devon just yet.

Travelling Tanners

Bom dia, from Cascais!

I can't be at today's game, a shame as it's a massive one. We could catapult ourselves out of the relegation zone today with a win and a fair wind.  We're off to Wingate & Finchley!

Kick off at 3pm.  Boa sorte!

Tanners 2 - 1 Cray Wanderers

Leatherhead stole all three points from the jaws of abject-boredom and defeat when it looked like we were finished for the season.

Considering how big this game was it was surprising just how flat the atmosphere was, both on and off the pitch.  Cray were determined not to lose and we happily obliged.  Jermaine was our main threat but when he limped off in the first half we were looking very average.

Second half and Max started to dominate a little more down the left started to cause Cray some problems.  A low cross, fired into the far post, was left by a defender who wanted to avoid an own goal and fell to a surprised Eshun who blasted wide from just a few yards.

Disaster struck when Cray decided that there was more than a draw on offer and put on a spell of pressure.  After about 10 minutes the pressure told and they headed home for what looked to be the winner on 70 minutes.

Eshun was replaced by Tayo and suddenly the pace on the left started to worry Cray.  This perhaps caused enough space for a ball chipped down the middle to leave Achie free and one on one with the 'keeper.  

There was a period where time stood still as the ball seemed to get stuck at his feet and just as we prepared for a shot to be hit straight at the 'keeper a panicked defender lunged in from behind, taking out Archie before he got to the ball.  Penalty.

Louie Le Tissier Paget stepped up and scored yet another penalty for Leatherhead.  Finding the side netting, giving the 'keeper no chance despite diving the right way.

A draw felt like relief but the winner brought wild jubilation.  In the last few minutes the ball fell to Max; marked and at a tight angle he made just enough room for himself to send a shot at goal.  It didn't have power, it didn't need to.  It was just placed - nay, tickled - right at the far post beyond the reach of the 'keeper to send Cray to their knees.

Wingate & Finchley remains a big game after all...

Cray Wanderers are coming

We welcome Cray Wanderers today in yet another must win game.  With East Thurrock playing Merstham today it proves to be even more decisive.  

Should both ourselves and Eath Thurrock win, we would find ourselves bottom despite winning four out of the last five games.  Things are getting tight.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Horsham 0 - 1 Tanners

Oh.  Oh my.

Only a win would do today as we look to achieve the "Great Escape" and thanks to some committed defending we managed it.

Our goal was stunning as it was simple.  Horsham were clearly confident about getting the win so decided to play party games; the first being musical statues.  Just as Max drove in a low ball, the music stopped and they froze.  

For most players the ball would be described as chest height but for Cameron it was at knee level; perfect to caress into the bottom corner.

Leatherhead then were put under increasing amounts of pressure as Horsham tried to respond which only got worse when McAuley saw a second yellow on the stroke of half time.  At the time I thought the ref had got it badly wrong when his attempt at a tackle didn't make contact with the Horsham player but I understand it was down to him controlling the ball with his hand to prevent a breakaway.

The second half was all about digging in and sticking to the task.  Leatherhead had some luck but we deserved it.  Jacob Adams made some incredible saves.  Cameron and Mitchel threw themselves in front of every attempt they could. 

Eventually we saw out the 45 minutes and moved into injury-time... it was almost like starting the half again as the referee added on minute after minute.  We watched in disbelief as everytime we cleared the ball, Horsham were allowed to reclaim and recycle the ball without the referee so much as looking at his watch.  

With the clocks going forward at 1am there was a risk of 60 minutes being instantly added but eventually the ref found his whistle and sent players and travelling supporters into wild celebrations.

Four points behind Cray... guess who rocks up the Grove on Saturday..?

Travelling Tanners

The A24 Derby is upon us as we play our old friends Horsham in their new home for only the second time.

We lost 3-1 at our place earlier in the season where we caught them just as they turned a corner following a string of defeats in the league (although doing very well, thankyou, in the FA Cup).

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Travelling Tanners

For some this will be the second trip to Enfield - well at least the second trip South Mims on the M25 - as this game was called off late in the day.

We're going on the back of two wins but our hosts will pose a very different problem to solve.

Kick off at 7.45. Good luck fellas.

Tanners 3 - 1 East Thurrock

Home success at last as Leatherhead snatched a win in the last few minutes where it looked like it was heading for a draw or worse.

The first thing that was apparent was that a number of East Thurrock yoof had taken advantage of the free coach travel and, armed with cans of their dads' beer, decided to stand with the home fans behind the goal.

The cherubs fell a little silent when Gough pounced on a ball in the box and headed past the stranded 'keeper.  Leatherhead looked the brighter side and went into halftime feeling confident.

The confidence should have been rewarded with a second goal when Jermaine was through one on one with the 'keeper but missed his chance to make it comfortable.

Inevitably this lifted East Thurrock who forced a good save before slotting home an equaliser after a spell of pressure.  Suddenly the sugar rush from the fizzy pop kicked in and the East Thurrock boys were full of it.

Leatherhead were nervous as the game entered the final minutes and it looked like a meaningless draw was fast approaching.  Suddenly Oyeboya (I think) found himself on the right hand edge of the box with only the 'keeper for company.  

The 'keeper tried to make a tackle but missed and brought our player down.  The ref' went for the default option of waving it away but amazingly the referee assistant (who clearly isn't in the officials' "Let's stitch up Leatherhead" WhatsApp group) waved his flag.  The referee then gave the penalty.  Begrudgingly.

Louie Paget stepped up and scored via the post to wild celebrations but with five minutes to go the supporters knew it wasn't over just yet.

Then the lively Oyeboya, in stoppage time, made a good run and latched onto a ball in front of goal and slid it under the 'keeper.  3-1 and surely we had all three points.  I realised, being the grown up, it would be wrong to gloat in front of the visiting kids.  Instead I adopted a dignified celebration to not make them feel any worse than they already did.  Well.  I should have done those things...

Three points and while the league is still not pretty reading it looks a lot better than it could have done had we lost as we now plan for a difficult trip to Enfield on Tuesday...

East Thurrock are coming

We've been here before. A big must-win home game where we turn up full of hope but leave with our tails between our legs.  Let's hope today is different.

East Thurrock arrive at the Grove, just one place above us and maintained their gap thanks to a fine win last weekend.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Corinthian-Casuals 1 - 2 Tanners

A vital three points on the road as we beat Corinthian-Casuals 2-1.  Not for the first time we got the winner in the dying minutes, but where we had a period of exciting "will they, won't they?" in those games this was more "they probably won't".

Leatherhead were on the whole the better side and deserved the three points but when the Casuals opened the scoring it looked like it was going to be another of those days.

As the first half drew to a close we needed something to lift us and it came in the unlikely shape of Mitchell Gough who launched into a flying header, the kind of which still has Trevor Brooking heralded by West Ham.

The second half and our hosts were really quite happy with a point and we were probably too nervous to try and change their minds.  The game seemed certain for a draw until we got a corner in the last minute of the game.  Corinthian-Casuals dealt with the first ball in but could not prevent the second ball sailing onto the head of Cameron Black, who deftly guided it into the bottom corner.

Two crucial goals scored by centre-backs which sets us up nicely for the massive game on Saturday...

Travelling Tanners

For what feels like the 10th time this season we travel to Tolworth in search of a must needed win.  Today we face Corinthian-Casuals as we attempt to climb off the bottom of the table.

It won't be easy as they sit mid-table and have had two credible draws against Lewes and Bognor Regis in the league while holding Carshalton to a 0-0 in the Surrey Senior Cup.

Kick off at 3pm.  You should know the directions by now.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 0 - 1 Lewes

A result as tough to take as it was to watch in parts; spoilt mainly by a ref who managed to award a soft penalty and book four of our players while sparing any punishment for any of the visitors.

Leatherhead started the game well with Jermaine spearheading our attack.  Then midway through the first half he had a one one one with the keeper but scuffed his shot and pulled a hamstring at the same time.  He limped off with our chances of getting a win from the game.

The ref then saw to it to remove any hope of a draw in the second half when he saw two hands rest on a striker's back and when he flopped down awarded the penalty.

Our players became frustrated with this.  None more so than the also impressive Archie Burnett who was booked for a mere coming together but did not see anything go the other way when one of his runs were brought to an abrupt and cynical end.

Corinthian-Casuals on Saturday...

Lewes are coming

Lewes come to the Grove as we search for our first win of the season.  The reverse fixture was a baptism of fire for one of the previous management teams.  A good start soon fell apart when we had a player sent off and the resulting free kick took a wicked deflection to make 2-0... and from there it got worse.

A new striker arrives at The Grove to try and make the same impact that Merstham's two new signings did for them on Saturday.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Merstham 2 - 1 Tanners

Before the game I was commended for my optimism.  Should I express similar sentiments after this result I would expect to be taken away in a straight jacket.  Neither the performance nor the result give us any real hope of pulling off the Great Escape this season.

It all started so well.  A blind backpass was pounced on by Jermaine who calmly slotted it past the 'keeper on just 15 minutes.  That was the height of Leatherhead excitement as the attacking threat of our new players - dare I call the Christos Palace!? - dried up.

By the half hour mark it was Merstham that looked the most likely to score and after a string of corners to build the pressure they equalised.  Leatherhead defence stood off enough to allow a simple tap in.

Second half and Leatherhead needed a response that on the whole did not come.  We had a couple of flashes but there was no real death or glory mentality to really take the game to the hosts.

If our defence was indifferent to allow the first goal it was indecisive to allow the second.  A high ball was allowed to bounce up over the head of the defender and the Merstham striker ran in behind and placed his free shot on goal into the corner.

The game finished 2-1 and left me to go home and check my passport is up to date for trips to Guernsey.

Travelling Tanners

I have just realised I have neglected to write up Saturday's match report.  We lost.  2-0.

Our push for survival was never going to truly rest in February.  That was a sticker of a month.  It was always, sadly, going to be about our last 11 games and could we win 7 of them.... and that starts tomorrow with the trip to Merstham.

Merstham, a trip of mixed results of ever there was one.  Hopefully the club can march to the beat of the same drum and get a result...

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Hornchurch are coming

Fifth place Hornchurch come to the Grove today, in what will be a tough game.

The away fixture was a one-that-got-away fixture as we took an early lead, failed to double the lead moments later and then conceded a very late equaliser (while almost losing it with a save in the last few seconds).

The sun is out; bar open; kick off at 3pm.  See you there! 

Travelling Tanners

A long trip to face a high flying Enfield Town is in store for Leatherhead today.  

Sitting in third place with the second highest number of goals will mean all of the newly formed resilience we have seen will be fully tested today.  Hopefully they will put up a better fight than some of my fence panelling.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  Good luck fellas!

Tanners 2 - 2 Bognor Regis

It looked like a well earned point, until you see the video evidence and you realise a terrible decision costs us yet again...

Leatherhead again looked competitive but this time with a more attacking edge.  The first half wasn't exactly all out attack but we had two penalty shouts waved away (standard) and the ball struck the bar after forcing their 'keeper into a fine save.

Second half is where it all really happened.  Lamont opened the scoring past an injured injured 'keeper, whose damaged hand was not strong enough to keep his long range out.  Bognor's choice to play an injured 'keeper was bold, but when you haven't scored at home for nearly 6 hours it probably didn't seem like such a gamble at the time.

1-0 and we were starting to drop deeper to defend and were faced with a string of opportunities to clear a ball but failed.  1-1.

Then the controversy.  At the time, from 100 yards away it looked a bizarre decision and the video evidence doesn't make much more sense either.

A ball into the box was collected by our 'keeper... he got their first and turns his back to protect himself from the challenging player who, if anything, makes a late tackle (a yellow card?).  The striker then hauls our 'keeper to the floor (a further yellow card or straight red?) and the ref runs backwards while looking at all of this to make up his mind... penalty to Bognor and one yellow to their player.

2-1 it looked like we were robbed of anything until the ref did see and obvious push in the box.  Up stepped German, who had missed a one on one earlier, to grab an equaliser.  

Jermain was brought down in  the box minutes later but the ref's incompetence didn't stretch to awarding the same team two penalties.  Archie Burnett had the ball in the back of the net but the assistant decided, unlike his incompetent opposite number at the other end, to assist and rule it out for offside.

Frustrating but on we go with a visit from Lewes on Tuesday...

Bognor Regis Town are coming

Tuesday night saw a battling performance against Margate rewarded with a point.  It could have been more when a defender "unintentionally" batted the ball away to safety with his hand in the second half.

Tomorrow we place similarly placed opposition in Bognor Regis.  A side that narrowly beat us 3-2 earlier in the season after we took an early lead.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Margate are coming

Saturday saw a battling performance away at Cheshunt which resulted in a 1-0 loss.  Our last 15 minutes could have been worth more but we were thwarted by an excellent 'keeper.  That said, our new 'keeper pulled off a fine doble save in the first half.

Tonight we continue with our run of tough games with the visit of 9th placed Margate.  A side that we lost 4-2 away earlier in the season.  Some loan recalls and injuries means a couple of new signings will be on show tonight...

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Travelling Tanners

A long trip today against another well placed side in Cheshunt.

I thought we had turned a corner when we faced them at home.  We had just won 2-0 and the then goal hero struck early… we went on to be worn down for a 2-1 loss.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas!

Tanners 0 - 0 Bishop's Stortford

After the euphoria of the away win it was down to the mucky business of grinding out any kind of result at home.  If we only played away, we would be in a comfortable 13th place but for some reason the green green grass of the Grove has not proved to be a happy hunting ground.

There were three moments that summed this game up for me.  A headed clearance off our line in the first half; along with a dive and a struck post in the second.  On another day that would be two conceded goals and a penalty kick awarded against us.  Not today.

Another key moment came in the second half when their no 14, already booked for not retreating 10 yards for a freekick, decided he wanted to pull one of our players down by the neck.  A brief mele followed and the ref dished out several yellow cards; one of which was to the instigator who now saw red.

The visitors are a tough side and despite facing 10 men for the second time in a row our main objective was to compete and keep them at bay.

So, after the heavy defeat at Worthing we have gone on to collect 5 points from three games and suddenly Cheshunt just seems a few miles closer...

Bishop Stortford are coming?

Have I been to Bishop Stortford? That doesn't matter now as the third place team are coming to The Grove.

Our home record is a disaster but the away win and new look team may give them a surprise.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there!

Haringey 2 - 3 Tanners

A fantastic day on the road all round for Leatherhead as we get a vital win on the road.

The day started early for me, in a pub that was stated as being in the top 6 pubs in Kings Cross but certainly wasn't.  I had somehow persuaded Guy to join me and we discussed our chances.  

After a couple of Madris we headed to Wood Green where Guy insisted we buy a "walking beer"... a can of Polish beer for the journey.  I could feel my membership to the Institute of Chartered Accountants of England & Wales being revoked with every step.

Onto the game and a bright start was soon replaced by Haringey pressure.  Suddenly a cross was met by a player who cleverly adjusted his run to beat his marker to head it home for 1-0 to the hosts.

The half wore on and as the pressure grew so did the need for me to stare at my feet and there between the gaps in the decking I spotted the wink of Winston Churchill.  A not-so-crisp £5 note lay there and with no obvious tools I employed child labour and the hand of Chloe to grab it.  It was that "we will never surrender" spirit that soon filtered out onto the pitch.

The first miracle was that we were awarded a penalty kick.  A clear mistimed tackle was spotted and up stepped Bohui to send the 'keeper the wrong way.  We should have had a penalty moments later when not one but two players were pulled back when trying to run onto a through ball... but ref had deployed the only one penalty per team law.

Going in 1-1 would have been something to celebrate, so when Archie Burnett pounced on a loose ball in the box and smashed it home from close range to make it 2-1 it caused pints of Guinness to be splattered everywhere.

Second half and normal service resumed when the ref saw a ball strike the hand and awarded the 12th penalty kick against us.  It struck the post but snuck in.

The game did swing back in our favour when one of their players saw his second yellow but Haringey had nothing to lose and still looked to win the game.  At this point the ref went a little bit rogue and failed to see an obvious foul on the edge of the box.  This coincided with my third pint of Guinness, so for the resulting tarade I issued I am truly sorry.

We wanted to win it too as opportunities like this won't come often and it came when a saved shot fell to McGlashan who slotted it under the 'keeper on 89 minutes. Wild scenes followed and well throughout the final few minutes until the handsome ref blew for full time.

Off we marched to Finsbury Park for a couple of Neck Oils to finish off a night that ended with a missed train and a lost bag.

Quite the match to set us up for a friendly Tuesday before another big game on Saturday...

Travelling Tanners

Tomorrow we travel to Haringey Borough, a side many feel we were unfairly denied all three points by a lino who saw a handball where no one else did.

I understand Antonio will be available, so with a proven goalscorer seagulls will be circling in anticipation of Woody throwing his chips up into the air.

Kick off at 3pm.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Cray 0 - 0 Tanners

Luke must have had a bone to pick with a number of his players as a couple announced their departure via Twitter.  With Antonio's international clearance still pending it meant we fielded a weaker side than we would have liked.

This was a game played out by two sides at the bottom of the table and this was largely reflected in the quality of the game.  Cray Wanderers probably had the better of the first half in terms of chances.  Had Manny not been in such form we may have found ourselves a couple down.  We did have some good spells, though.

There were some moments of madness from the referee in the first half.  A tackle brought down our player and the ball ran out of play.  The referee indicated a goal kick... so the defender didn't make contact with the ball it seems.  Then a Cray defender, on a couple of yards from the ball, prevented a quick free kick... the ref allowed play to continue with Cray now in possession.

So with these two first-half blunders under his belt it was hardly surprising when he was called upon to make a difficult decision of whether someone being pulled back in the back was a penalty he bottled it.

We did play a lot better and looked the most likely to score although we did manage to gift them a chance at a completely open goal after Manny came to catch a ball over one of his defenders and dropped it but we managed to block it somehow.

A point is better than nothing but the games are starting to run out...

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead hit the road tonight when we face Cray Wanderers in one of those "must win" games.

New players come in with Antonio being the latest having received international clearance.  Hopefully that will give us more threat than we offered against Worthing.

Kick off at 7.45.  Directions can be found here.  See you there!

Worthing 4 - 0 Tanners

The last time Leatherhead made a major change to the management they lost their opening game 5-0 away to Lewes.  This time we only lost 4-0... so... baby steps and all that...

Leatherhead didn't do much wrong - in fact for the first 20 minutes they were very much in control of the situation - they were just overrun by a very good side.  On 25 minutes it started to unravel though.  Our achilles heel were long diagonal balls which their pacey strikers could run onto.  This caught us out and put them 1-0.  The pre-match optimism of grabbing a 1-0 win turned to a 1-1 draw... but this only lasted 60 seconds until the next diagonal ball was chased, crossed in and finished to make it 2-0.

This effectively put the game to bed and when they headed home a corner shortly before halftime this should have caused many of the travelling fans to head for the exit... but they didn't.  They stuck around to the end to out-sing the home fans.

Second half and 3-0 became 4-0 just through sheer weight of numbers in their breakaway attack.  At this point four Worthing "fans" joined us to goad us a little.  I am not sure how small your penis needs to be to do this to supporters of a club that are both bottom of the league and 4-0 down but try it they did.  If anything it only served to raise our spirits and cause louder singing and off they went to google the names of the Worthing players.

So.  A big loss but that won't matter if we get a result on Wednesday...

Travelling Tanners

After the disappointment of a late postponement last weekend we travel to Worthing today for Luke's first competitive game.

A lot has changed since his arrival, with some big names arriving at the Grove. Let's hope they settle in time for kick off!

Kickoff at 3pm.  See you there!

Dorking Wanderers are coming

The Advertiser Trophy Take II.   Winner takes all!  That isn't the official line but that is what I declare should we pull off a win tonight... Dorking Wanderers are coming tonight for this free friendly.

I did raise an eyebrow when I saw this.  Perhaps a slightly lower placed opposition would have allowed for a better learning experience but still a good chance for the new manager to see what is what.

Kick off at 7.45.  See you there!

Margate are coming!

Eighth place Margate come to the Grove to play out this soggy-league match.

Luke has had a chance to bring in a few new faces as well as a welcome recall of the Dorking Tower.

Kick off at 3pm.  See you there (from 1.30)!

Travelling Tanners

Leatherhead's tough run of games continue with a trip to Folkestone.  A side that find themselves in fourth place, despite losing to Margate on New Years Day… a side we face at home - at home! - on Saturday.

The players have chipped in to leave £50 behind the bar to any supporters making the trip.  Something for free would normally see me scurrying to the ground but alas I'm taking my in-laws to the airport.

Kick off at 3pm.  Good luck fellas.

Tanners 2 - 3 Ks

As I drove to the game I listened to Arsenal taking Man City apart and wondered whether we could perform a similar feat.  I then sat down in the club house and watched the current natural order of football play out and got a sinking feeling.

Leatherhead started the game in a positive mood with creative play coming mainly from Isaac.  On 34 minutes he went past a player and was through on goal, choosing to square the ball to Bakare rather than shoot.  It first looked like Bakare had taken a touch too many but his powerful shot went straight through the 'keeper.

Our lead lasted only a couple of minutes before a cross was prodded home by a desperate Leatherhead defender to notch up an own goal. Beats a penalty I guess.

The second half saw a much more determined Ks side and they put us under pressure.  Ironically it was from a rare piece of early Leatherhead pressure that they scored. A quick long ball from their 'keeper caught us out and they scored on the break.

Many Leatherhead fas would have assumed this was the killer blow and the game was lost.  No, that disappointment would come later.  An excellent cross was powerfully headed home by Hamilton Bunga; another player whose crisp paperwork bears my signature.

2-2 would have been a good result but then we get down to small margins that make the difference.  A Ks player picks up the ball 10 yards in his own half and goes on a run.  He was tracked by a Leatherhead player so the Ks player merely bent his run into the path of the tracking player and went down.  The ref duly gave it.  

The resulting freekick, some 40 yards out, still had plenty of opportunity to be defended before being headed across goal and blasted in, but these are the tricks our young squad are not familiar with.

2-3 it ends and we now have the prospect of going to Folkestone.  It is away at least...

Ks are coming

With Leatherhead looking at potentially getting a new manager I'm surprised we haven't "done a Newcastle" and got this game postponed… but we're better than that.

Today we welcome Ks as we enter the second half of the season. Winning games is now vital but the New Year fixtures were not kind… 

Kick off at 3pm… big game some come early to avoid the queues… see you there!