After a great start to the season, we get to travel to our old friends Burgess Hill. You have to go back 10 years since we last played there, when we lost 3-2. Let’s hope for better today.
Our hosts sit three points behind us, having tasted defeat on the opening day away to Brentwood Town.
Kick off at 3pm. Directions can be found here. Good luck fellas!
Coming away with three points on Saturday, after a determined second-half performance, was validation that we could compete at our new level — but that can all change with a couple of heavy defeats. So I entered the ground wondering whether Welling United, a side that probably fancies being there or thereabouts this season, would be the ones to knock us off our not-so-lofty perch. Any fears I had were soon put to bed as we unleashed an unforgiving attack that saw us race into a 4–0 lead by half-time.
Anas was first on the scoresheet. A Welling defender failed to cut out a cross and only succeeded in prodding it to Anas, who received the ball about 15 yards out on the right. The keeper must have anticipated a shot across goal, as he seemed wholly unprepared for the effort into the near top corner and could only get the slightest hand to it as it flew in. Just three minutes later he doubled the scoreline when a cross from the left was flicked down into his path a few yards from goal and he calmly slid the ball under the keeper.
Twenty minutes gone, 2–0 up, and still part of me worried that one goal from Welling would change the dynamic — but as we neared the end of the half, the game was effectively tucked up in bed. On 41 minutes, Dickson received the ball about 25 yards from goal out on the right and advanced towards goal. We all expected a cross to pick someone out, but instead he let fly with an audacious dipping shot that sailed over the keeper and into the far-side netting — our first goal at the far post of the season. Then, on the stroke of half-time, Waters took hold of the ball in central midfield and let fly after beating a couple of Welling players. The shot took a deflection and, once again, the Welling keeper looked like a man who wished he’d taken up golf instead. 4–0.
Into the second half, and Ian Selley activated “Let’s Not Do Anything Silly” mode as we played a far more measured game. The Lip’s Barrington forced a save with a header, and a smart corner routine might have produced another goal with a cleaner finish, but we were rarely troubled for the first 30 minutes. Then, following a number of changes, Welling increased the pressure, created some chances, and hit the post in the process. Eventually they got a consolation on 89 minutes, and had one of the earlier chances gone in, “Binfield” might have been muttered around the ground — but by then the game was won.
On to Saturday then, when we travel to Burgess Hill, who beat Three Bridges 3–2 last night…
Tonight we welcome Welling United for the first competitive game that I can remember. They travelled here in 2012 and 2013 for friendlies but cannot see where we played them outside of that.
Back then, Welling United got themselves into the Conference Premier before dropping back down to Conference South until their relegation in 2025. With an opening day win, they look like a tough test for us tonight.
Meanwhile, you can pick your favourite Leatherhead players (well, up to three of them) and enter a side in the Tanners Fantasy League. More details can be found here tannersfantasy.com.
Kick off at 7.45. See you there!
Leatherhead got one of their longest trips of the season under their belts with a 2–1 win at Ramsgate yesterday, extending their unbeaten away run.
We started brightly and got our reward. Kofi picked up the ball on the left, cut inside and drilled a low shot into the bottom corner. It may have taken a slight deflection, but the keeper should have done better with his attempt to save it. 1–0.
Shortly afterwards, Ramsgate’s No. 18 lost his head and found the referee in a charitable mood. We were attacking down the right when he stormed in from behind, leading with a forearm into the back of the head and bringing our man down. On another day — or a little later in the game — it might easily have been a yellow, but he was instead let off with a talking-to. He was then involved in two more incidents, including one where the assistant appeared to spot something off the ball, and still only got another word in his ear. He was fortunate to still be on the pitch by the time he eventually picked up a yellow in the second half — at which point he finally piped down.
Meanwhile, Leatherhead had gone all England in the face of Argentinian-style pressure and were defending desperately for the last 30 minutes of the half — until we popped up with a second goal. A cross from the right sailed over everyone and found Murphy alone at the far post. His powerful volley beat the keeper, again at his near post, which perhaps offered a clue as to why he had No. 13 on his back.
It is a testament to last year’s squad that nine of them started this game. It is also a testament to the recruitment work that both of the new signings got on the scoresheet.
At 2–0, with only two minutes of added time left, Leatherhead relaxed. We relaxed a little too much and allowed Ramsgate to saunter down the left, put in a cross, and pick out an unmarked player to head home. 2–1, and in we went for half-time.
The second half was a completely different affair in terms of our confidence and control. Ramsgate rarely put us under pressure, while we dictated the game in search of a third goal. A few performances are worth calling out. The Lip’s Barrington came on for Breckon and completely changed our dynamic up front. Ramsgate’s No. 5 had Breckon well under control, but Barrington’s pace and power changed all of that and suddenly we had an outlet. He also hit the outside of the net when he again looked to beat the keeper at — no surprises — his near post. Hogan came on and had a good chance to get the third, but opted for a lob that sailed over. Lastly, Charlie Kennett — what a performance. He won his duels and was a constant thorn in the side of the hosts.
We held on for all three points and headed home strangely disappointed to be outside the play-off places on goals scored. On to Tuesday then, when we host Welling, who also won at home to Whitehawk.
Since their revival, Walton & Hersham is a side we have not done well against so last week’s 2-1 win is the perfect way to end the pre-season and get into the season ahead. This starts with the long trip to Ramsgate.
Ramsgate is a side we don’t play often. There was the FA Sodding Trophy last season and then we have to go back to 2019 where we won 2-1. Going back to 2013 we also opened the season and won 1-0 thanks to a Matt Smart goal. Strangely I missed both of these away trips so the New Ground Klaxon sounds for me.
Kick off at 3pm. Directions can be found here. See you there!
Walton & Hersham arrive at the Grove today in our final friendly of the season. I hope we can get through it without any injuries before we make the long trip to Ramsgate next Saturday.
Both sides enjoyed title winning seasons last year. Our guests won the Southern League Premier South to earn promotion to the National League South for the first time in its history.
Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas!
Luke Tuffs brings his side to the Grove as we near the end of our preparations for next season. Hydration breaks will no doubt be put in force today, as it looks hot out there. Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas.
The bogey ground of South Park restored its calamitous effect on Leatherhead, as we came away from this fixture with a 4–2 defeat. The Lip also appears not to have lost its touch when it comes to sponsoring players, as no sooner had I confirmed I wanted to sponsor Marcel than I looked over to see him on the sideline with a bandaged knee.
South Park have worked hard on making the ground look a lot nicer, and we probably spent more time admiring it than we did Leatherhead’s play on the pitch. It did start brightly though, as Anas broke clear down the right and finished at the near post. Danny Bracken will struggle to get to his targeted 1,000 appearances with that attempt to keep it out.
Leatherhead’s dominance did not translate into more goals, so we went in at half-time ahead. I sent my son off to the car to pick up a cardigan as the temperature was dipping, so it amused me that we needed hydration breaks. I hope the World Cup hasn’t made this a permanent fixture…
Out they came for the second half, and it all went south for Leatherhead. First, a long-range shot found its way into the back of the net, and then a smart shot on the turn, just inside the box, also beat Sonny. Sonny was quickly swapped out to see if that would change our fortunes.
Nathan Hogan put us back on level terms with a finely placed curling shot from the left that clipped the post and went in to make it 2–2. Any hopes of going on to win it disappeared when South Park curled one in directly from a corner and then scored with another shot from distance. 2-4.
Preparations for next season will have to step up with the visit of Ashford Town (Middlesex) in the Luke Tuffs Derby.
After the weekend’s comeback where Leatherhead turned out to be the Argentina of Surrey with a long range shot and a close-range header in the dying minutes (that reference made more sense when I drafted it before the final on Sunday) to beat Merstham 2-1, we travel to South Park in fine form.
Our hosts finished 10th last season and were probably shaken by not getting the six points this bogey side usually get from us as we shook off the hoodoo and won both games without conceding. That’s jinxed it, then.
Kick off at 7.45. Directions can be found here. See you there!
Old friends, Merstham, arrive at The Grove today for our next friendly. Merstham play in the Isthmian South East division and finished 10th last season. Kick off at 3pm. Good luck fellas.
For the first time in four years, Leatherhead not only made this game competitive but walked away with the trophy. After 5–1 last year and 4–1 the year before, it was starting to become one of those fixtures where you wondered when it would be polite to leave early. This year, though — with some promising-looking new signings — we looked the part.
Leatherhead survived an early scare when Dorking hit the post, but it was Leatherhead who opened the scoring. We won a free-kick outside the box and Hogan stepped up and — not deterred by the distance — bent it over the wall and into the side netting. 1–0.
The lead lasted around 20 minutes before it started to feel as though the game was heading in its usual direction. The ref awarded a soft free-kick, almost identical in softness to the one Mexico won just before half-time. The ball was sent in and George Nikaj finished it off. Four minutes later he picked up the ball just inside our half, drove at our defence and found the bottom corner with a low shot. Somehow, we managed to hold on until half-time and go in only 2–1 down.
The second half started and two things struck me. First, the Dorking “ultras” — prepubescent teens who swapped ends just to look “menacing”. I’d thought they’d stayed at the end we were shooting in during the first half because they’d gone there by mistake, but their decision to change ends after the break proved it was a deliberate ploy. They even wore matching all-black outfits in a further attempt to “intimidate”, but what they failed to realise is that, amongst other things, their middle-class Dorking background meant their uniform was purchased in stored like Urban Outfitters or Superdry. The Stone Island / Lonsdale-wearing youth of Moneyfields would have taken one look at this lot and run amok with them.
The second thought was just how much better the team that came out after the break looked. Dorking will say that was because they fielded some academy players. I’m sure they’ve done that in the past and still won 5–1, though. This time, we were taking the game to them and looking the better side.
An attack down the left found Anas unmarked. Despite the cross being a little high, he dispatched his volley coolly into the top-left corner. 2–2. Then Barrington started making his presence known.
Last season, Barrington’s late arrival gave the impression of someone who was handy to have around. In just 45 minutes here, he produced a man-of-the-match display and was a constant menace to the Dorking defence. So much so that on 80 minutes the Dorking “ultras” went back to the end they were shooting towards — this wasn’t fun anymore.
In the closing stages, he fired a shot onto the crossbar, scored from close range only for it to be ruled out for being a little too rough on the poor Dorking Wanderers keeper, and then finally got his goal. He received the ball on the penalty spot, made room for himself and then fired the ball into the top-left corner. 3–2.
So, the Advertiser Trophy and the Mole Valley are green and white again. Here’s hoping that continues into the season ahead…
After a game I couldn’t see and then midweek commitments, The Lip! comes out of its annual hibernation for the start of the season. Today we host Dorking Wanderers in the Advertiser Trophy. A game where the away fans can enter, drink and stand where they like. The civilised half of this annual competition. Kick off at 3pm. See you there!
For two sides with average attendances in the low hundreds, it was a credit to them that nearly 1,500 turned up for this final. While impressive, as the ground offers very little in terracing it struggled to cope and it was difficult to find a comfortable spot. By contrast, I was at the Combined Counties ground of Rusthall for their final with only 50 fewer and found it a lot more enjoyable.
The game itself didn’t burst into life as frenetically as it did on Wednesday — we had to wait a full 15 minutes for the first drama. A cross into the box was misjudged by a Westfield defender and the ball hit his raised arm, denying a Hanworth Villa player a chance on goal. The ref hesitated, then pointed to the spot and also brandished a yellow card. It was unclear whether the yellow was for the handball or for petulantly scuffing the penalty spot. The kick was calmly dispatched and the visitors were 1–0 up.
With bigger crowds come a greater number of idiots. A Hanworth Villa fan left his flag behind the goal his team were warming up in front of. He mistakenly believed it would be safe once the game kicked off and they were shooting the other way. A jaunty chorus of “we’ve got your flag” seemed like harmless banter, but the mood changed when “we’ve ripped your flag” started up and fans and security guards had to wade in and retrieve it. You stay classy, Westfield.
Ten minutes into the second half, the game swung well and truly in Hanworth’s favour as Westfield were reduced to ten men. The player booked for the penalty incident had already survived a poor tackle — and a warning — but then brought down a player advancing on goal. Ten minutes after that it was all sewn up when a low ball into the box bounced around before a Hanworth player prodded it past the Westfield keeper. 2–0.
Suddenly we were surrounded by non-league experts as they discussed what league Hanworth — and a number of other clubs — would be in next season. The general consensus was the would be in “the Southern”… along with Chertsey, and something about Chichester, with it all to be decided on 15 May.Strangely, no one mentioned Leatherhead…
Unsurprisingly, no one mentioned Westfield, as they were being completely battered by now. Hanworth should have scored two more in the closing minutes with two clear chances. I can only assume that, with a large sandpit in each goalmouth, the players forgot they were playing football and thought they were now competing in the long jump.
The full-time whistle brought a mini pitch invasion and well-earned celebrations from Hanworth Villa’s players and management. That just left Westfield — cocky and ungracious in November, distraught in May — to trudge off and eat some humble pie. Shame.
Two glorious moments of high drama bookended a nervy game, where both sides seemed reluctant to fully commit until the dying moments — when it briefly looked like Portchester might pinch it.
On arrival at the ground, it looked like we were in for a sensational crowd, but on closer inspection many of the coaches were for a school trip. So, in reality, it was a more modest attendance — with a respectable number still making the journey up from the south coast.
The game didn’t take long to spark into life. In the opening minute, a cross-cum-shot flew in and beat the keeper (I couldn’t see if anyone got a final touch). Disaster for the visitors… until, from the restart, they lofted a ball into the box for their striker to run onto. He just beat the keeper to it and was brought down in the process. As we found away at Moneyfields, there’s no red card if there’s a genuine attempt to play the ball, so Portchester had to make do with the penalty — which they put away to make it 1–1 after just three minutes.
I joked about getting two goals in three minutes and it ending 1–1 — and that’s exactly how it transpired. Westfield did get a penalty on 75 minutes, but it was saved. Portchester applied real pressure in the last few minutes and throughout the six of added time, but it ended all square.
An interesting rule change meant extra time was scrapped. Strange, given this isn’t some poxy league cup but the culmination of a whole season, yet both sides seemed to accept their fate and set up for penalties pretty quickly.
The first two pairs were scored, and then Westfield missed — the ball clipped the bar, came down on the line, then clipped the keeper, who somehow reacted before it rolled in. There must be a statistic on this, but I always feel the penalty after a save is one of the hardest to take, and sure enough Portchester’s next was well saved.
The remaining penalties were all scored until we reached the eighth. I’d noticed the Portchester keeper had been creeping off his line and sensed it would catch up with him. When he saved again, the ref indicated it had to be retaken. The re-take was put away to make it 7–6 to Westfield, and then up stepped “Cal”…
Poor Cal. He’d taken dog’s abuse from the management team all game and could do no right. When the penalty was saved, he ran forwards — either to celebrate a bit too early (Portchester would have had to score next anyway) or to remonstrate. Either way, it earned him a yellow card, which promptly incensed the Westfield bench. They were convinced it was his second and he should be off, and tried desperately to intervene… only to pipe down when Cal then skied the ball into Sheerwater and Westfield won the game.
I wouldn’t have predicted this, but both sides from Portsmouth lost, setting up a final between Westfield and Hanworth Villa on Sunday…
Leatherhead walked out to their last guard of honour of the season — and to a crowd of over 700 — to play out this end-of-season game. With both sides having nothing to play for, it would have been forgivable to simply go through the motions, but an entertaining game was played out.
Leatherhead looked like they wanted to finish with a bang. Breckon was soon firing just over, and Waters clipped the bar with a powerful shot. Breckon opened the scoring on 22 minutes. Kennett won a free-kick on the edge of the box, and it was placed onto the head of the striker, who made no mistake. 1–0.
Leatherhead didn’t go without the odd scare. Sonny Wheeler was forced into a good save to keep us 1–0 at half-time.
The half-time team talk must have focused on the need to get Hogan his outright Golden Boot, because he played like a man possessed — with his teammates determined to help. Take Jordan Gallagher, once described as a great footballer but a horrible bloke by a former chairman: he was through on goal but, rather than take the shot, tried to feed Hogan for a tap-in.
On 75 minutes, The Lip’s Player of the Season, Sonny Wheeler, was subbed off so he could get the standing ovation he deserved. Not a dry eye in the house. Moments later, George Hedley rose — perfectly manicured stubble and all — to head home our second and make the three points safe. 2–0.
The game was a fitting end to our season, and the start of a night of celebration where others picked up their awards. Now all that remains is to sit back, with a cool beer, and watch the drama of the play-offs unfold…
True last day of the season stuff today as safe and relegation Bedfont Sports come to play already crown champions Leatherhead. Perhaps the biggest thing on offer today is the chance for Hogan to rightfully claim his golden boot. Kick off at 3pm. See you there!
The green green grass of away. Leatherhead ticked off three of their objectives with a 4-2 win at Southall. Remain unbeaten away from home all season, tick. Score 100 goals, tick. Maintain Hogan’s run in for the Golden Boot, tick.
Anas got us on our way before South struck back with two goals. Then up stepped Hogan. First a goal on 35 minutes to draw level and then late in the game to put us 3-2 up. Gorgeous George got our 100th goal on 90 minutes. 4-2.
Back to The Grove on Saturday, for the last game of the season and player presentations…
My pre-match write-up included the rather smug line of “where were you at Hendon?”, as I suspected far fewer would travel to this one than, say, Littlehampton. It was a position I almost instantly regretted as the 1 hour 15-minute journey became 1 hour 45. Throw in a surprise road closure and it was a cool two hours. It was the kind of trip that needed, in addition to a cold pint, a pulsating passage of play to get me over it. Unfortunately, I had to wait until about the 55-minute mark to get it.
We looked livelier than we did against Met Police, but still not the side that tore into Ks, for example. Anas went just wide on 14 minutes, but other than that we were content to keep our hosts at bay.
Into the clubhouse at half-time — and to catch the Grand National. My mind cast back to last year, when we were already several goals down against Uxbridge. Another reminder that I’m still owed a pint.
Second half, and Nathan’s run and shot ten minutes in suggested we wanted to win this game. Hendon responded three minutes later with a powerful header. 0–1.
It looked like Cameron Black had a quick equaliser when he hit a fierce side-volley from near the penalty spot. It seemed destined for the back of the net, but somehow the keeper managed to get two firm hands on it and keep it out.
All looked lost as we entered the last of the seven minutes of added time, so I drifted towards the gate. A local shouted at the ref, asking why he’d added so much time for us “twats” (I think he meant “champions”), just as we launched our final attack. A cross was met by a Hendon defender, who could only loop it into the air. The ball fell to Barrington, who hit a powerful volley that the keeper couldn’t get to this time. 1–1.
Hendon slumped to the floor, while we celebrated keeping our away unbeaten run intact. The last test of that record comes on Saturday, when we travel to Southall.